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Thread: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

  1. #1

    [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    *I was looking for a funny title, and so I used Wikipedia's random article button three times. Figured it'd be more fun than something boring like "REPORT."

    #Yeah, I'm not gonna translate that. I love it when people put pretentious quotes at the start of their things, so I figured I'd follow suit. Deal with it.


    First of all, I'd like to tell the Elgin brothers that I'm sorry that I missed their birthday, and wish them a happy belated one.

    Secondly, if you don't care that I didn't top 8, don't bother reading (unless you like to hear the sound of my voice as much as I do, in which case, press on).

    Thirdly, this event was probably my last one for a long while. I'll still troll around here when the time is right, but I won't be flaunting my silver tongue as often as I have in the past (you'll have to relay my apologies to your mom).

    Fourth, since it's like four days after the event I'm sure somebody's gonna ask which event I'm writing about, so I'll just clarify: Beta Tundra event, Syracuse, NY, 3 January 2009.

    REPORT TIME:
    Like in September I decided that I'd like to start playing Jack Elgin decks. You guys know me. I love me some "screw blue" decks, and he seems to build some of the most efficient ones. But what to play?

    I hadn't made a decision until after the Source event, where I saw that Team America and Dreadstill would be played a bunch more often. So... nothing with fetches. That left me with Wombat or the vastly superior Mighty Quinn. At which point I commissioned Clemens "DIF" Wolf to hook me up with some sweet, German-style Snow-Covered Plains. They're freaking excellent, btw. I'd say as hot as they come, save perhaps Jap Foil (although new face is the terribleness).

    I stole a handful of foily things from my teammates, and came up with this list:

    18 Snow-Covered plains
    4 Scrying Sheets
    4 Sensei's Diving Top
    3 Enlightened Tutor
    3 Eternal Dragon
    3 Runed Halo
    3 Oblivion Ring
    1 Moat
    2 Isochron Scepter
    1 Sacred Mesa
    2 Grindstone
    2 Painter's Servant
    4 Orim's Chant
    3 Abeyance
    4 Swords to Plowshares
    3 Wrath of God
    Sideboard:
    3 Ray of Distortion
    2 Story Circle
    2 Decree of Justice
    1 Sacred Mesa
    1 Sacred Ground
    2 Tormod's Crypt
    1 Relic of the Prodeginitadlafjaldkfjq;wlnma;lkvja;dlsfkja;
    1 Abeyance
    1 Rule of Law
    1 Hanna's Custody (this was TERRIBLE. Don't waste your two dollars one one)

    Without any more banter, let me get onto how I played this monstrosity:

    Round 1: Matt Abold, GBwr Survival (no wish)
    Game 1: Matt and I have a lot of playing back and forth - Matt gets a turn 2 Survival, I get a turn 3 Oblivion ring before he can activate it, I have like 100 wraths when I need them (<3 top) for Matt's creatures, he has discard to cut me off of the combo. We get to a point where I have dumped Anger into Matt's 'yard, I have 4 life, and he plays a Dark Confidant on me then passes the turn. He swings in (after I deal with the Confidant) for two damage with a Quirion Ranger and Squee in later turns (remembering the Anger), but that two damage would have killed me if he'd not forgotten it. I seal it with a CHANT LOCK on turn twelve or so.
    Game 2: Matt knocks 4 cards out of my hand with 2 Thoughtsiezes and a Cabal Therapy, then plays 3 Tarmogoyfs in three turns. I'll give him this one.
    Game 3: I get a CHANT LOCK on Matt for a while until he draws a grip. By then a Decree for 4 beats Matt to 8. He plays some dudes, I play a moat, then a Dragon and some Mesa tokens. Combat math is checked when we go into turns and I'll beat him by precisely the right amount.

    2-1
    1-0-0

    Austin (FROM AUBURN, NY)(YOU FOOLS! THIS MEANS HE KNOWS KYLE HUMPHRY!!!!! AND HIS DCI RATING IS LIKE A 1834 OR SOMETHING ELSE WICKED SIGNIFICANT!!!!!!1!!eleven), with Ur Dreadstill:
    Game 1: I get quick Halos on Mishra's Factory (and then Austin draws 3) and Phyrexian Dreadnought, but a Trinket Mage is enough to beat me to death after Counterbalance hits the table. I scoop it up.
    Game 2: A Moat and a handful of Chants make me live forever. Wipe Away + Force (and Counterbalance on my Chant, maybe) answers that, though. I die pretty quickly to an onslaught of 3 Factory Workers.

    HIGHLIGHT OF THE DAY:
    I paid 10 mana to blow up two Counterbalances. Best two Disenchants I've ever played.

    0-2
    1-1-0

    I get matched up against Eli Kassis (sp?). I put him on the best deck buildable, 'cause he owns a freaking nerd card store.
    Game 1: I keep a hand with Stone + Servant. But Eli drops a Mire on me and passes the turn. I put him on Team America, lead with a Top (to avoid Daze) instead of going for the turn 3 win. Eli fetches an Undergound, duresses me (taking the 'stone), drops a fetch, and passes. I rip another Stone like a champ, and play it. My next turn I play Servant on Black (still expecting Snuff Out). Eli plays 10,000 rituals, Ill Gotten Gains, and I tap top in hopes of having a Chant that wasn't in my top 3 cards when I looked that same turn. Frown town.
    Game 2: I board in the 4th Abeyance, a Rule of Law, and a couple Crypts (over stupid spot removal). I land a Rule of Law, have 3 Chant effects when Eli duresses me the turn after, and ride it out for the long game. Eli wishes for and plays Empty the Warrens over two turns (for two). I respond by Decreeing for 6, I think, and that's all she wrote.
    Game 3: I have another 2 Chants in hand when Eli duresses me (and he accuses me of savagery)(I'll take this moment to hate on the Virginians for not coming. I got like 0 high fives all day.), then land CHANT LOCK after Eli burning wishes for Ponder (off of a Lotus Petal - he kept a 1-lander and didn't find any more mana). He scoops (as his only answers are some number of Serenities).

    Eli gives me the win 2-0 as he's gonna drop.
    2-0 (secret loss omitted)
    2-1-0

    Round 4: Bryan Fynlasen-Schuler's UGb tempo Thresh
    Game 1: This was hilarious. There's a picture of me with a shit-eating grin when Bryan Thoughtsiezes me. My hand? 3 Orim's Chant, 2 Abeyance, 1 Painter Servant, 1 Snow-Plains. Serious lulz. I chant through a Moat around turn eight or ten. Bryan scoops (no Tombstalker).
    Game 2: I mull to 6, win with Mesa Tokens (like a hundred of them). My notes for this game were sketchy.

    2-0
    3-1-0

    Round 5: Joe (from CT maybe) with GBW Survival
    Game 1: I get beat by some serious Tarmogoyf action while topping into 3 Wraths in a row. It was great. Joe rebuilds with Genesis, Vials, and multiple Witnesses. I bait Joe into using his Harmonic Sliver on a Runed Halo on something, then O-Ring his Sliver (praying he didn't run any more enchantment hate main) and drop a Moat. A Faerie Macabre beats me down to 4 before I find a Swords, and then Joe asks what my win is. I offer to play it out, but he scoops when he Duresses me and sees something (a Painter's Servant maybe).
    Game 2: I get a turn 4 CHANT LOCK, but I worry like the whole game. Joe eats my Dragons with that Faerie Macabre a couple times, and then I Chant on my turn and Grindstone him out with Painter (I love having like 1000 mana). Joe admits sheepishly that he doesn't play Krosan Grips (just another Harmonic and a Veridian Zealot in the board).

    2-0
    4-1-0

    Round 6: Lam Phan's UGr Tempo Thresh (OH SNAP WE'RE THE FEATURE MATCH)
    Game 1: I get some quick Halos on Lam's wincons, then get nine mana, Chant (countered), Chant, Painter, Stone, win.
    Game 2: Lam finds 2 Goyfs and beats me to death.
    Game 3: Same deal. I don't want to make his wins seem trivial (game 2 I was manascrewed), but he made tight plays, and kicked my ass. I can't bitch about that.

    1-2
    4-2-0

    Round 7: Zach Fine (Ichorid)
    Well, I have another opportunity to knock Zach out of prizes (I did the same thing at the Trop Event, I think).
    Game 1: Zach mulls to 6 (other Zach, not me, you idiots). I Abeyance him on his turn after my turns 2 and 3, then get a CHANT LOCK on him turn four. G4m3z0rz
    Game 2: Zach keeps a hand of seven. He Careful Studies out a Golgari Thug, then passes the turn. I have a chant so I go Plains, pass. He dredges into nothing spectacular, passes. I tutor endstep for Relic, draw and play it (I'm holding another Tutor in my hand). Zach cracks an LED for threshold, then activates a Coliseum. I relic in response, drawing into a Crypt (insert Dave Gearhart looking over my shoulder, seeing the draw, and then high-fiving me into oblivion). He draws a Stinkweed Imp and pitches it. The blow-by-blow is pretty boring. I burn his yard 3 times, beat him to death with 2 Dragons. I feel like it was a pretty decisive victory. Zach's mistake? Dropping a Needle on Grindstone instead of Crypt (he'd totally have won if he had done this, at least game 2).

    2-0
    5-2-0

    Good enough for 12th place.

    EXTENDED PROPS AND SLOPS:
    Since it's gonna be my last event for a while I mise-well make it fun, right?

    Props:
    • Colin first, this time. 'Cause both he and Jim kept the dream alive, only Colin did a better job of it this time than either of us.
    • Jim
    • Altered - your events are fun, even if you won't let me pee in your bathroom.
    • Adam, for hooking me up with sweet foil versions of stuff I didn't own.
    • Rich Borque, his awkward, baby-horse-standing-up-for-the-first-time style of Legacy play
    • Canadians, 'cause they took home some serious loot. Although I suppose that's to be expected, 'cause they live in a tundra, right?
    • Clemens, for making sure I had the pimpest manabase possible
    • Jack Elgin, for making Quinn
    • Dave Elrod, for having the uncanny ability to give decks the best name ever (Quinn = "The Deck that Jack Elgin Built")
    • Ah-hah, for Take Me On
    • CHANT LOCK!!!!!!!!!
    • Barak Obama, for being in the Heroes season 3 finale
    • Eli, for being a classy gentleman and giving me the full win
    • Jason Korrigan (sp?), for being the funnest Judge I've ever had occasion to have
    • BlitzkrEIg guys
      • lulz @ your hoodies
    • Ray Robilliard, for a pimp type 4 Stack, excellent methods of randomization, and general awesomeness
    • Chuck, for doing some sweet event coverage
    • Geoffrey Beffrey Smelski, for being one classy mofo to sit next to occasionally
    • Raider Bob and that guy from The Grid Games, for thinking that The Deck That Jack Elgin Built was cool
    • Rick Argerierierierierio, for making it out (and having a last name that gets one syllable longer each time we meet)
    • Flux in between rounds


    Slops:
    • Albany (at least Albany that didn't come)
    • Getting matched up against team members round 1
    • Not being able to kill my own Patrick Star with Spungebob Squarepants
    • Pokemon
      • Nah, dude. I'm not into Pokemon.
    • Hammerfist, for promising me Chants and then not showing up
    • Virginia. I know that 3-16 only got packs, but it would be nice to see you more often
    • Mike Edinger, for his girl parts


    It's been real, guys. And I'll still see you around the internet and such, but it may very well never be the same. Remember, it's not you - it's me.

  2. #2

    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Quote Originally Posted by Zach Tartell View Post
    [*]Mike Edinger, for his girl parts
    Wait, what? What'd I do?
    SOURCE ASSHOLE
    Now Epic-ly Sexy
    My blog

    Buy the ticket, take the ride.

  3. #3
    Bryant Cook
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    When you die, can I stuff you?

    Good report, needs more me in the props.

  4. #4

    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    For future reference, someone can't give you the 2-0 win if you lost a game. Doing so is knowing you can't is cheating; Eli is a level 1 judge and experienced player so he ought to know.
    “It's possible. But it involves... {checks archives} Nature's Revolt, Opalescence, two Unstable Shapeshifters (one of which started as a Doppelganger), a Tide, an animated land, a creature with Fading, a Silver Wyvern, some way to get a creature into play in response to stuff, some way to get a land into play in response to stuff (a different land from the animated land), and one heck of a Rube Goldberg timing diagram.
    -David DeLaney

  5. #5
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Quote Originally Posted by Zach Tartell View Post
    Virginia. I know that 3-16 only got packs, but it would be nice to see you more often
    Seriously none of us draft so packs are completly worthless to us. If you want us to come give prizes to more than just the top 2. We would have totally been there if it wasn't packs for prizes.

  6. #6
    Bryant Cook
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Suck it up.

  7. #7
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Quote Originally Posted by TeenieBopper View Post
    Wait, what? What'd I do?
    You ordered a cosmo. Am I the only one who remembers this?
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Quote Originally Posted by Bryant Cook View Post
    Suck it up.


    Dave's pretty good at that.
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Great report. I watched your match vs. Lam on the live-feed and you killed me; esp. the deals you working out while sideboarding. :)

    Re: your deck. Seems to be suffering from an extreme lack of Islands.

    Anyway, well done.

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    Tom MacDonald
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Hammerfist, for promising me Chants and then not showing up
    Zach Tartell, You asked me for chants for Hadley, no this tournament.
    Team Hammafist
    Quote Originally Posted by Admiral_Arzar View Post
    What kind of fucked-up, drug-laden, alternate universe of faerie rape does this guy live in?

  11. #11
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Not enough Jack El-

    Wait, no. I guess that was a sufficient amount.

    Yeah, Thresh with red is such a ridiculously harder matchup than normal Thresh.

    Was this game recorded? Can I still watch it somewhere?

    Anyway. Grats on the almost Top 8. Yeah, I apologize on the Custody, I was just trying it out when I sent the list. The sideboard needs some sort of life gain. Faith's Fetters? Recumbent Bliss? Genju of the Fields?

    Hm. Y'know, Warmth could also come in against a lot of combo and Goblins. That's a thought.


    Quote Originally Posted by cdr View Post
    For future reference, someone can't give you the 2-0 win if you lost a game. Doing so is knowing you can't is cheating; Eli is a level 1 judge and experienced player so he ought to know.
    Tsk tsk.
    For my confessions, they burned me with fire/
    And found I was for endurance made

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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Great report! Grats for almost getting there.

    And as nobody else wants to say it:
    Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt
    probs for the reference =)
    Sneaky Pirates of Doom - Not really a Legacy Team anymore.

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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Quote Originally Posted by TheInfamousBearAssassin View Post
    The sideboard needs some sort of life gain. Faith's Fetters? Recumbent Bliss? Genju of the Fields
    Pulse of the fields?

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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Zach not coming to Hadley?
    Quote Originally Posted by Bryant Cook
    This change also changed the sideboard, Xantid Swarm - it’s been real. Peace.

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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    UW Landstill sometimes uses Ajani. Though Quinn can't make much use of the second ability.
    SummenSaugen: well, I use Chaos Orb, Animate Artifact, and Dance of Many to make the table we're playing on my chaos orb token
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  16. #16
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    It was a pleasure sitting a match over from you a couple times.
    Good luck with the whole teaching thing.

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  17. #17
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    I hope that wasn't sarcasm. I've been very happy with Ray of Revelation. pwns the mirror match, let me tell you what.

    @Ajani, Pulse: I meant a one of that could be tutored for. Although, having 2-3 Ajanis would supplement the DoJ/Mesa plan.
    For my confessions, they burned me with fire/
    And found I was for endurance made

  18. #18
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Quote Originally Posted by Zach Tartell View Post
    At which point I commissioned Clemens "DIF" Wolf to hook me up with some sweet, German-style Snow-Covered Plains. They're freaking excellent, btw. I'd say as hot as they come, save perhaps Jap Foil (although new face is the terribleness).
    And guess who he comissioned to get them? That sucker doen't have a bank account and thus called me to get them for him like "pwease, can you buy them for me, I fail at having a bank account and I get APAC Lands for them!"

    Credits go to Team SPOD!

    Quote Originally Posted by TheInfamousBearAssassin View Post
    @Ajani, Pulse: I meant a one of that could be tutored for.
    ...Honden of Cleansing Fire?
    Team SPOD
    <Der_imaginäre_Freund> props:
    Adan for being the NQG God (drawer)

  19. #19
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Quote Originally Posted by Adan View Post

    ...Honden of Cleansing Fire?
    Does anyone else REALLY want this deck to turn into Ninja Strike?

  20. #20
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    Re: [California Attorney General]* "Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt"#

    Quote Originally Posted by Nightmare View Post
    Does anyone else REALLY want this deck to turn into Ninja Strike?
    No, but it actually does the same like Ajani (2 Life per turn) and is tutorable, thus fulfills all the requirements stated above. Whether I meant it seriously is another thing, lol.
    Team SPOD
    <Der_imaginäre_Freund> props:
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