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Thread: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

  1. #1021
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    You realize that the whole drawback loses every meaning once you forget to add the word "another" somewhere in between the "control" and "a Forest".
    However, it's nice. Similar to checklands, yet different. Nice.
    Flavour text, however...

    ___________________________________
    Richard Footpalm
    Legendary Creature - Human Nomad Mystic

    Threshold - complete landwalk
    (As long as there are seven
    or more cards in your graveyard,
    this creature is unblockable as
    long as the defending player
    controls any land.)


    Whenever Richard Footpalm attacks,
    search your library for a fetchland and
    put it otb.

    Ilus.: Richard Kane Fergusson

    _______________________________ 6/6

  2. #1022
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    _____________________________________
    Horse Fed Rob Ken's Grass
    Enchantment

    , Sacrifice a land: Put two 2/2 green
    and white Horse tokens with horsemanship otb.
    , Sacrifice a horse: Return target basic land
    from your graveyard otb tapped.
    _____________________________________

  3. #1023
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Mesmerizing Utopia
    Land
    T: Add to your mana pool.
    T: If a creature you control would be put into your library from the battlefield this turn, it remains on the battlefield instead.
    Who would want to leave such a beautiful world?

  4. #1024

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Vicar in a tutu View Post
    Mesmerizing Utopia
    Land
    T: Add to your mana pool.
    T: If a creature you control would be put into your library from the battlefield this turn, it remains on the battlefield instead.
    Who would want to leave such a beautiful world?
    I'd like

    Mesmerizing Utopia
    Legendary Island

    Phasing

    T: Add U to your mana pool.
    T, Put a creature you control on the top of your library: Mesmerizing Utopia phases out.

    Would you want to leave such a beautiful world?

  5. #1025
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread



    Wrong wording!
    Either it puts creature you own on top of your library, or it puts creature you control on top its owner's library!
    /rulesnazism

  6. #1026
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Sloshthedark View Post
    I'd like

    Mesmerizing Utopia
    Legendary Island

    Phasing

    T: Add U to your mana pool.
    T, Put a creature you control on the top of your library: Mesmerizing Utopia phases out.

    Would you want to leave such a beautiful world?
    Although this variant is cool as well, the whole point of my card was to hose Terminus. As a bonus, Commander players get to use it to protect their generals from being tucked into the libraries with spells like Spin Into Myth.

  7. #1027

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Bed Decks Palyer View Post


    Wrong wording!
    Either it puts creature you own on top of your library, or it puts creature you control on top its owner's library!
    /rulesnazism


    you're right


    Quote Originally Posted by Vicar in a tutu View Post
    Although this variant is cool as well, the whole point of my card was to hose Terminus. As a bonus, Commander players get to use it to protect their generals from being tucked into the libraries with spells like Spin Into Myth.
    Oh I did not realize the Terminus part, maybe because I don't play creatures much... I really dislike it then, narrow "hate" cards and cards hosing specific card are very wrong in terms of design approach in my eyes and hurts the game a lot...

    I did not want to correct or improve your design just inspired me into what I find interesting, which are intricate cards with unusual functionality

  8. #1028

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Bed Decks Palyer View Post
    _____________________________________
    Horse Fed Rob Ken's Grass
    Enchantment

    , Sacrifice a land: Put two 2/2 green
    and white Horse tokens with horsemanship otb.
    , Sacrifice a horse: Return target basic land
    from your graveyard otb tapped.
    _____________________________________
    Perhaps I'm overestimating it but this card seems bonkers. Having the ability to end step put 12 unblockable power on the battlefield for 3 mana seems nuts, while also being able to grind games out with 2 mana 2/2's.
    Quote Originally Posted by Bryant Cook View Post
    I can't wait to fetch for Tropical, ponder and then kill them on my second turn.

  9. #1029
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by trollking21 View Post
    Perhaps I'm overestimating it but this card seems bonkers. Having the ability to end step put 12 unblockable power on the battlefield for 3 mana seems nuts, while also being able to grind games out with 2 mana 2/2's.
    Yeah!
    But then again we got those 22 goblins on turn2 and this does very little the turn you play it.
    End it makes you eat lands to have those 2/2 dudes.
    Etc.

    I know it's a silly card, but I was in a mood for making a silly things.

  10. #1030
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Sloshthedark View Post
    Oh I did not realize the Terminus part, maybe because I don't play creatures much... I really dislike it then, narrow "hate" cards and cards hosing specific card are very wrong in terms of design approach in my eyes and hurts the game a lot...

    I did not want to correct or improve your design just inspired me into what I find interesting, which are intricate cards with unusual functionality
    If the card said "your creatures gain immunity to Terminus", then I would agree with you. But Mesmerizing Utopia is no more a narrow "hate" card than Homeward Path is against spells and effects that steal permanents. Utopia works against all effects that tuck your creatures, so it's useful in Commander / EDH, but in addition it also has applications in legacy. You can also use it in combinations with other cards. Cast Hallowed Burial and use Mesmerizing Utopia, so that all enemy creatures are tucked into their owner's library, but your creatures stay on the battlefield. The card has a lot of functionality beyond simply "hose Terminus".

  11. #1031

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Vicar in a tutu View Post
    If the card said "your creatures gain immunity to Terminus", then I would agree with you. But Mesmerizing Utopia is no more a narrow "hate" card than Homeward Path is against spells and effects that steal permanents. Utopia works against all effects that tuck your creatures, so it's useful in Commander / EDH, but in addition it also has applications in legacy. You can also use it in combinations with other cards. Cast Hallowed Burial and use Mesmerizing Utopia, so that all enemy creatures are tucked into their owner's library, but your creatures stay on the battlefield. The card has a lot of functionality beyond simply "hose Terminus".
    ok, I don't play EDH, I just apply Legacy optics
    Last edited by Sloshthedark; 09-08-2014 at 12:38 PM.

  12. #1032
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Curse of Dementia
    Enchantment - Aura Curse
    Enchant player
    If the enchanted player would discard a card, instead that player discards that card and an additional card at random.
    Last edited by Vicar in a tutu; 09-19-2014 at 07:56 AM.

  13. #1033
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Constrain Rumination
    Instant
    Each player can't draw more than one card this turn.
    Flashback
    Calm your mind.

  14. #1034
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Vicar in a tutu View Post
    Constrain Rumination
    Instant
    Each player can't draw more than one card this turn.
    Flashback
    Calm your mind.
    That seems terribly conditional and like a mediocre SB card at best.

  15. #1035
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Barook View Post
    That seems terribly conditional and like a mediocre SB card at best.
    It might not be maindeckable, but I don't think every new card has to be.

  16. #1036
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Doomward
    Instant
    Target player gains protection from a color of your choice until end of the turn.
    Emerge from the inferno unscathed.

    Aegis Decomposer
    Artifact
    When Aegis Decomposer enters the battlefield, draw a card.
    Players and permanents lose protection and can’t have or gain protection.
    Last edited by Vicar in a tutu; 09-30-2014 at 11:18 AM.

  17. #1037
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Ravensburg Torturer
    Creature - Human Advisor
    Deathtouch
    Whenever a player pays life, that player loses that much life.
    2/1
    Each sting of pain just magnifies his appetite.
    Last edited by Vicar in a tutu; 09-29-2014 at 06:30 AM.

  18. #1038
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    I just keep on spamming here:

    Inspired Earthmaiden
    Creature - Nymph
    Flash
    Whenever an opponent draws a card, if it's not the first card he or she drew this turn, put a reverie counter on Inspired Earthmaiden.
    Remove a reverie counter from Inspired Earthmaiden: Add , , or to your mana pool.
    0/2

    Demented Hierarch
    Creature - Human Druid
    Exalted
    Landfall - Whenever a land enters the battlefield under your control, exile up to one card from an opponent's graveyard and that opponent loses 1 life.
    0/1
    Last edited by Vicar in a tutu; 10-08-2014 at 03:12 AM.

  19. #1039

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Contaminated Goblin Cart
    Creature - Goblin
    Whenever you're dealt damage, sacrifice Contaminated Goblin Cart unless you sacrifice a Goblin.
    If a land is tapped for mana, it produces instead of any other type and amount.
    1/1
    Eww, they're dying all over our land.

    Or something.

  20. #1040

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by LOLWut View Post
    Contaminated Goblin Cart
    Creature - Goblin
    Whenever you're dealt damage, sacrifice Contaminated Goblin Cart unless you sacrifice a Goblin.
    If a land is tapped for mana, it produces instead of any other type and amount.
    1/1
    Eww, they're dying all over our land.

    Or something.
    Piggy-backing off this:

    Goblin Plague Doctor RR

    Creature - Goblin Shaman

    At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Goblin Plague Doctor unless yoUu sacrifice a goblin.
    Goblin creatures you control have infect, and "at the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice this creature unless you sacrifice a goblin."

    "'Cure me'? Oh. That makes more sense. I heard 'kill me'" - Snot -Snout Poxhide, chief of goblin medicine

    0/2
    Last edited by kirkusjones; 10-16-2014 at 09:53 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by TsumiBand View Post
    It's like arguing your way out of a speeding ticket by saying "it's not like I'm wearing oven mitts, officer."
    Twenty Kavus and a Dream is NOT a Legacy deck.

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