Just when you thought there was hope...

[android]

...this guy shows up.

Is this for real? Do most gamers really stink and live in their mom's basement?

http://minneapolis.craigslist.org/ram/m4w/1450688187.html

[Nihil Credo]

Until the part about prostitutes, I was wondering if it could have been Cavius.

[Master Shake]

I was going to say that this made my day, but it actually kind of nauseated me.

But, like any good comedian he saved the best punch line for the end:


I'm a lesbian. Being a male lesbian isn't as fun as you'd initially think

[android]

I think they are brothers separated at birth.

I would suggest someone archive this one for posterity's sake. Humankind would do well to not repeat the mistakes of this moron.

[Phoenix Ignition]

Oh... my god. Minneapolis usually doesn't disappoint me so. I thought people here were -relatively- not douche bags.

*Hopes this was just a troll posting, like craig's list is famous for*

[Dan Turner]

Wow That Was Just, Just.....great Loved It My Laugh Of The Day.

[rockout]

Such a sad, sad, man.

[FoulQ]

They always say the best way to pick up ladies is to be yourself.

This obviously proves them wrong.

[Ectoplasm]

They always say the best way to pick up ladies is to be yourself.

This obviously proves them wrong.

This, and I hope to god it's a troll (it probably is)

[android]

I thought it might be a troll at first too but then some of it struck me as being far too sincere. You can't make this shit up. All I can think is that this guy is looking for a woman with a very low self worth. And yes, it's sad that there are people out there like this digging through your garbage for "loot".

[Mr.C]

It's a troll. 100% sure.

[Mr. Fantastic]

Wow, talk about putting your best foot forward. "Hey guys, I dig through the trash and can't hold down a minimum wage job. Also, you're a cunt if you won't date me."

[Ectoplasm]

The digging through trash thing makes me believe it's a troll.

[quicksilver]

This made my day.

Also to ensure this gets preserved here is a copy of it:


Looking for a date/companion for Grand Prix Minneapolis - 23 (UMN, St. Paul)

Is every female my own age who visits this site a judgmental cunt? And you wonder why you're gonna die alone. You'd do well to take a lesson from the tired old adage "Beggars can't be choosers."

Edit: The event is on Saturday, November 14 and Sunday the 15th.

Anyway, I am looking for a female that is passionate about Magic: The Gathering. Everyone who just said to themselves "Ew, a children's card game" would do well to press Alt + <- right now. This event ain't for kids, you goddamn sluts. Well, maybe disquietingly smart ones. The total purse is $30,000, with $3,500 going to the first place finisher, $2,300 to the second, $1,500 to third and fourth. Can you win a fistful of cash from a children's card game? That's what I thought. I'm looking for a female companion for the day, not Companion in the Firefly sense, more like a D&D druid's companion. I'd like (but don't expect) to find a female with whom I could carry on a relationship including love.

A little about me:
I acquire food and items of value out of the trash for use whenever possible. The loot is frankly amazing.
I am pretty poor and trying to get a job. Unfortunately, I am competing for minimum wage jobs with people with bachelor's degrees and I cannot afford college.
I have a terrific voice.
I am an extremely devout atheist with shamanistic beliefs. No, it's not a contradiction. It's kind of like Wicca only without the morbid obesity/anorexia, embarrassing fake names, wearing black and pretending to be a vampire/cast spells. On second thought, it's nothing like Wicca.
I love free things. They're great. I also love making weird sounds when I burp. It's a lost art.
I cannot currently add any green mana to my mana pool because I need a goddamn job, but am wholly 420 compatible.
I do not like makeup. Prostitutes use makeup and while I have no problem with prostitutes, I have no intention of mating with a prostitute.
I hate human larvae. They are gross.
I am easily distracted. My distraction is amplified a million fold by cracked.com. You try not getting fascinated by their lists.
I love America and the people in it, but the corrupt corporation-run government and everyone being in complete denial about it is getting pretty fucking old.
I'm a lesbian. Being a male lesbian isn't as fun as you'd initially think.

About the event:
www.wizards.com/Magic/Magazine/Article.aspx?x=mtgcom/grandprix/minneapolis09

How could you doubt that this is real? In case you don't believe me, I am currently watching Arrested Development and it is the funniest show in the goddamn world.

[gravemind123]

Hilarious troll is hilarious.

I love the line "This event ain't for kids, you goddamn sluts."

[sunshine]

I laughed pretty hard. Unless the dude was serious, in which case I actually died a little inside.

[majikal]

I laughed pretty hard. Unless the dude was serious, in which case I actually died a little inside.
Sig'd.

[Forbiddian]

If you guys don't know it's a troll, have yourself checked for retard.

[Mr. Fantastic]

Based solely on personal experiences of just how socially inept certain gamers can be, it would in no way, shape, or form surprise me to learn that this is for real. Count yourself lucky if you haven't personally spent any time around neck bearded basement dwellers.

[klaus]

So there: I wrote that thing up in 1.5 hours - glad you liked it :cool:

[sauce]

oh man, im totally gonna hit him up, what a warlord!








jk wtf :rolleyes:

[Aggro_zombies]

http://i121.photobucket.com/albums/o226/jbrennan0512/1201405206199.jpg


Amazing troll is AH-mazing. I lol'd.

[Ectoplasm]

oh man, im totally gonna hit him up, what a warlord!








jk wtf :rolleyes:

http://i33.tinypic.com/kcibf6.jpg

United we stand!

[Wereodile]

The digging through trash thing makes me believe it's a troll.

I know people *not friends* that are big into dumpster diving, finding everything from food to a fully functioning 52" Flat screen T.V

Not starting any trouble just saying that dumpster diving just isn't for trolls anymore.

[Jim Higginbottom]

you guys found my post! so....anyone interested in being my companion?

[android]

In the Firefly sense or like a D&D Druid's companion?

[Dan Turner]

I know people *not friends* that are big into dumpster diving, finding everything from food to a fully functioning 52" Flat screen T.V

Not starting any trouble just saying that dumpster diving just isn't for trolls anymore.


I can not say much i have a friend who works for the disposal company and he brings me electronics all the time from VCRS and DVD players to computers and TV's most either work or require very little work to get going.

[godryk]

I stopped reading just when he said he was only looking for female companion... what a pity, I pretty much thought it was my kind of guy... :frown:

[Iare]

Havn't you all heard dumpster diving is positioned to overtake baseball as America's number 2 past time (Beaten of course by eating). Might I recommend the best buy dumpsters always good shit in there.

sudo apt-get uninstall troll

[Goaswerfraiejen]

I know people *not friends* that are big into dumpster diving, finding everything from food to a fully functioning 52" Flat screen T.V

Not starting any trouble just saying that dumpster diving just isn't for trolls anymore.

My apartment was furnished thanks to dumpsters (minus the bed). Once I move out at the end of the year, it'll all go back for someone else to find.


Diving for food is fine, it just depends on what and where. After large farmers' markets, for example, you can often find all kinds of 100% okay vegetables in cardboard boxes in the trash, on the ground, etc. This is more common at European markets (especially in Paris), but I've seen crates of bell peppers at the market in Detroit, and every once in a while you come across something here in Canada. Stores (and students, when they move out) also often chuck canned veggies. It's not very hard to find stuff, and you don't often have to actually climb into the dumpster.

Hell, if you live near a potato farm, you can just ask where they dump the taters that don't meet size/shape requirements: they dump TONS of them. If you go, there are hundreds of thousands of potatoes for the gleaning. There's nothing wrong with them, they're just not up to snuff. They usually get dumped in a pile somewhere on the outskirts of the field.

Bakeries throw out their day-old bread at the end of the day. Usually, they bag it in a few layers of plastic bags before putting them out back: the bread is perfectly fine, and tastes fresh if you rehabilitate it in the oven. Again, there's nothing gross involved.

There's a lot of stigma associated with dumpster diving, but there's really nothing wrong with it unless you're bringing home meat (which spoils) or hanging out behind McDonald's for leftover fries and burgers (and even then, you do what you have to do).


There's a fantastic documentary on the subject of gleaning. In English, I believe it was translated into "The Gleaners and I" (Les glaneurs et les glaneuses). It's well worth watching.

[MattH]

Hell, if you live near a potato farm, you can just ask where they dump the taters that don't meet size/shape requirements: they dump TONS of them. If you go, there are hundreds of thousands of potatoes for the gleaning. There's nothing wrong with them, they're just not up to snuff. They usually get dumped in a pile somewhere on the outskirts of the field.

Did anyone else read this and picture the caigslist guy going, "MMM, TATERZZZ"?

[Nihil Credo]

There's a lot of stigma associated with dumpster diving, but there's really nothing wrong with it
If that's the case, what you should probably do is dumpster diving without telling everyone on the freaking Internet that you do.

[Goaswerfraiejen]

If that's the case, what you should probably do is dumpster diving without telling everyone on the freaking Internet that you do.

Shrug. It doesn't bother me in the slightest. It's not like you're wading through the sewers looking for furniture and have to wipe the shit off before you can use it. If anyone wants to be immature in their reactions, they're welcome to do it to my face rather than hiding behind the intarwebz.

I'll say it again: there's absolutely nothing wrong with getting stuff from a curb, dumpster, etc. Most of the stuff you find there is perfectly fine. The people who throw it out WOULD give it out for free (or to the Salvation Army or whatever), but they're too lazy. So instead it goes to the dump. If it's clean, in working condition, and you can put it to good use, then what's wrong with taking it out of the dumpster and bringing it home?

Similarly, if I see a crate of red peppers out back after the Saturday market in Detroit, what's wrong with taking some? If they were rotten, you might have a point--but then, if they were rotten, why would I take them?

The stigma that's associated with dumpster diving is misplaced, and derives from two sources as far as I can tell: 1.) A complete lack of understanding of the practice, and 2.) Deeply ingrained attitudes from consumer culture, which has taught us to believe that it's best to buy new, and that to pick something up from the curb is dirty and shameful. Instead, you should delight in the buying power of your capital! :rolleyes:

Speaking of dumpster diving... the dumpster behind my apartment currently holds someone's porn DVD collection, a large aquarium, and a pile of old pictures. Strange.

[andrew77]

If it's clean, in working condition, and you can put it to good use, then what's wrong with taking it out of the dumpster and bringing it home?


It is degrading. Anyone with a good deal of self-respect would never do this.

[Dan Turner]

It is degrading. Anyone with a good deal of self-respect would never do this.

and why not so it is better in our society to buy everything brand new instead of recycling it, I warn you never buy anything that has any post consumer content in it. Most of the time that has been reclaimed from the trash piles.

[Wereodile]

It is degrading. Anyone with a good deal of self-respect would never do this.

There's Lawyers and Doctors out there who are huge into Gleaning it's not apparently below them. Why buy something new when people like you throw things out after something small goes wrong with it? There's not a big difference between picking it up off the curb and buying the same item at the Salvation Army/March of Dimes store.

[Getsickanddie]

porn DVD collection

You need to fish that shit out and ship it to me asap.

[Versus]

Some in-laws of mine do it in the factory district. They have found full cases of toys, coloring books, ornaments, ect. Most of these are either deemed obsolete by the manufacturer or in their prototype/sample stages. They rescue this crap from the dumpsters and the sell it at garage sales on the weekend. They make anywhere from $300-500 per sale.

I think the real stigma here comes from the word "dumpster". It immediately denotes that what these people are taking is "garbage", when in most cases they are reusing things that others simply decided they don't need anymore. Some snobby housewife decides the dining room table she bought 6 months ago doesn't match her sweater, so she buys a new one and tosses the "old" one on the side of the road for someone with more frugal sensibilities to take advantage of.

Maybe a mechanic sees a perfectly good lawnmover kicked to the curb, brings it home, opens it up, replaces a $2 spark plug, fires it up, and resells it for $200. What's wrong with that? Everyone makes it sound like these people are dragging home cum stained mattresses behind their Huffy to go sleep on.

[godryk]

In Madrid you can only throw big things such as furniture one day a month (so that they only have to pick it up once a month). That very day, many people walk through the old city and surrounding "burgeois" neighbourhoods to chase that stuff, mostly replaced furniture.

In fact, you find many other people doing the same. It's ok for students to pick up some chairs and stuff in order to furnish their appartments. Sometimes you find cool things out there. Actually, some bohemian students would only furnish their homes with 'vintage' garbage. Of course middle-class people in their forties will be frowned upon. But still, it's fine to get some nice things if they're just in front of your door.

[Skeggi]

That is so gross. If I put my couch on the street, believe me, you don't want it.

[godryk]

Yeah, but I would probably pick your granma's coach if it would've been in the street for just 2 hours... just check:

- Schizophrenic beggar on it? Y/N
- Urine/mysterious fluids on it? Y/N

[paK0]

Found 40 Onslaught basics in the trashcan last tournament, perfectly fine, not a big find but oh well.

Its not like I really look into trashcans or something, but if something catches my eye and noone needs it why not take it if the condition is ok?

[Michael Keller]

Shrug. It doesn't bother me in the slightest. It's not like you're wading through the sewers looking for furniture and have to wipe the shit off before you can use it. If anyone wants to be immature in their reactions, they're welcome to do it to my face rather than hiding behind the intarwebz.

I'll say it again: there's absolutely nothing wrong with getting stuff from a curb, dumpster, etc. Most of the stuff you find there is perfectly fine. The people who throw it out WOULD give it out for free (or to the Salvation Army or whatever), but they're too lazy. So instead it goes to the dump. If it's clean, in working condition, and you can put it to good use, then what's wrong with taking it out of the dumpster and bringing it home?

Similarly, if I see a crate of red peppers out back after the Saturday market in Detroit, what's wrong with taking some? If they were rotten, you might have a point--but then, if they were rotten, why would I take them?

The stigma that's associated with dumpster diving is misplaced, and derives from two sources as far as I can tell: 1.) A complete lack of understanding of the practice, and 2.) Deeply ingrained attitudes from consumer culture, which has taught us to believe that it's best to buy new, and that to pick something up from the curb is dirty and shameful. Instead, you should delight in the buying power of your capital! :rolleyes:

Speaking of dumpster diving... the dumpster behind my apartment currently holds someone's porn DVD collection, a large aquarium, and a pile of old pictures. Strange.

http://sales.starcitygames.com/cardscans/MAGMDN/trash_for_treasure.jpg

[MattH]

In Madrid you can only throw big things such as furniture one day a month (so that they only have to pick it up once a month). That very day, many people walk through the old city and surrounding "burgeois" neighbourhoods to chase that stuff, mostly replaced furniture.

This happens here too, we call it "bulky pick-up day". If you put anything REMOTELY useful out, someone will be by in a pickup truck within 1.5 hours to take it, long before the garbagemen come. Last time, I put some old plywood, an office chair, and some rocks out, and there were people taking the rocks away before I had even finished moving them all to the curb.

[Phoenix Ignition]

The Source: Your source for dumpster diving advice.