Favorite Flavor Text

[Neuad]

Title says it all, whats your favorite flavor text?


Day of Judgment - I have seen planes leveled and all life rendered to dust. It brought no pleasure, even to a heart as dark as mine. - Sorin Markov

Burning Wish - She wished for a weapon, but not for the skill to use it.

Chandra's Outrage - Her mind is an incredible mix of emotion and power. Even if I could grasp it, I couldn't hold it for long. - Jace Beleren, on Chandra Nalaar.

[Shimi]

That's the best flavor text for me.
Chub Toad

"Chub toad, chub toad
At the door.
Run away quick
Or you'll run no more."
—Traditional children's rhyme

[Ch@os]

The german flavortext from Snap :



Und tschüß.

[Wargoos]

Living metal encasing dying flesh.

~Phyrexian Tower

[Nonex]

Wasteland

"The land promises nothing and keeps its promise."
- Oracle en-Vec

Brutal Suppression

"They no longer care about their own suffering. Show them something worse."
- Latulla, Keldon overseer

Toil to Renown

The last survivor of her patrol, the warrior returned expecting disappointment and scorn. Instead she found gratitude. "You are alive. That is reason to celebrate."

Barrin, Master Wizard

"Knowledge is no more expensive than ignorance, and at least as satisfying."

Crovax, Ascendant Hero

Crovax was destined for an angel's curse, but one warped timeline saw the noble redeemed.

Swat

Few who cross Phage have the chance to repeat the mistake.

[yankeedave]

Lava Axe - "Catch"

[elof]

After my favorite vintage deck:

"Meat and eggs. We eat!"

[Volrath]

Grim Feast

''Hmmm- Midnight snack.''

[MMogg]

Per my username, I love me some Goblin flava text:

Goblin Offensive: They certainly are.

Mogg Jailer: "Hey! Wake Up!" ~ Mogg secret password.

Mogg Flunkies: They'll attack whatever's in front of them –– as long as you tell them where that is.

[Digital Devil]

Paradise Lost, book 10:

http://deckbox.org/system/images/mtg/cards/4373.jpg


O miserable of happy! Is this the end
Of this new glorious world, and me so late.
The glory of that glory, who now become
Accursed of blessed?

[Nessaja]

Love this one from M11

http://media.wizards.com/images/magic/M11/o9dzaifh0j_EN.jpg

Goblin Spy is awesome too.
"Ïsn't he on our side?"
"Yep."
"Then why is he spying on us?"
"Don't ask."

[Gocho]

Ice Age's Incinerate: "Yes, I think 'toast' is an appropriate description." -Jaya Ballard, Task Mage

[Skeggi]

http://magiccards.info/scans/en/ts/163.jpg.

[Xeen]

Juzam Djinn

"Expect my visit when the darkness comes. The night I think is best for hiding all." -Ouallada

[menace13]

Every culture has its unlucky numbers. In a city where you're either alone, in a crowd, or being stabbed in the back, Two is the worst number of all.- Spell Snare

I wrecked your metal guy, boss. But look! I made you an ashtray.- Goblin Welder

Glok loved storms.. He'd sit an' watch an' laugh through the whole thing. I miss him.-Squee goblin cabin hand. -Firestorm.

The isle of Wak-Wak, home of a tribe of winged folk, is named for a peculiar fruit that grows there. The fruit looks like a women's head, and when ripe speaks the word "Wak"- Island of Wak-Wak

[jazzykat]

"I will show you fear in a handful of dust." — T. S. Eliot, "The Waste Land"

Foil DCI Promo Wasteland

[DownSyndromeKarl]

hard to choose, so much awesome flavor in Magic's history. I'll agree with Goblin Offensive and Lava Axe, and add these:

Bottle Gnomes - Reinforcements . . . or refreshments?

Organ Harvest - "Lucy, you've got some spleenin' to do."

EDIT:

One more that needs to be said:

Remand - "Well, at least all of that arm-waving and arcane babbling you did was impressive."

thats some awesome shit right there.

[Volrath]

http://medievalyfantasia.com/uploads/cartas-magic/bloque-espejismo/espejismo/cartas-multicolores/grim-feast-carta-magic.jpg

That one always cracked me up.

And this one, because it is so true.

http://toyaju.net/shop3/p_image/WL/Weatherlight-MischievousPoltergeist.jpg

[LostButSeeking]

"This violent wasteland is an indictment of its people. These cowards lack the will to oppose disorder." --Meddling Mage from Alara Reborn.

I love this one. It's so typically white/blue.

[swats0n]

i like this one:

http://magiccards.info/scans/en/mr/338.jpg

[Jason]

Poopy art, amazing flavor text:

http://deckbox.org/system/images/mtg/cards/185819.jpg

[Sanguine Voyeur]

May you wake to find you were only ever a dream.

Æther Snap.

[nitewolf9]

Have to:

http://sales.starcitygames.com/cardscans/MAGTEM/clergy_en_vec.jpg

[Plague Sliver]

^ classic.

My hands-down favorite: Flame Javelin.

Gyara Spearhurler would have been renowned for her deadly accuracy, if it weren't for her deadly accuracy.

[Jeff Kruchkow]

Punish Ignorance

"Amateurish. Nearsighted. A waste of my time and everyone else's."
—Indra, nullmage of Vectis

[Pinder]

i like this one:

http://magiccards.info/scans/en/mr/338.jpg

That's probably in my top 3 favorite flavor texts of all time. Another is Wave of Indifference

"Darius?"
"Yeah?"
"There's a goblin sneaking up on you."
"So?"
"Just sayin'."

[Anusien]

http://gatherer.wizards.com/Handlers/Image.ashx?multiverseid=184648&type=card
Jaya Ballard is the best flavor text source ever.

http://gatherer.wizards.com/Handlers/Image.ashx?multiverseid=11303&type=card
Shakespeare is the man.

http://gatherer.wizards.com/Handlers/Image.ashx?multiverseid=2109&type=card
Coleridge is the best poet ever.

[(nameless one)]

I really like Goblin Piledriver's flavor text:

"Throw enough goblins at any problem and it should go away. At the very least, there'll be fewer goblins."

[baghdadbob]

Wee dragonauts... In my sig!

[Zlatzman]

(...)
And this one, because it is so true.

http://www.extensiveenterprisesonline.com/OnlineStore/images/tcgs/mtg/wth/mischievous_poltergeist.jpg
Great one! Never though about it before.

My contribution in my signature, from Unhinge

[MEATROCKET]

Black Knight

Ah crap, not that one. The original:

Battle doesn't need a purpose; the battle is its own purpose. You don't ask why a plague spreads or a field burns. Don't ask why I fight.

[keys]

i like this one:

http://magiccards.info/scans/en/mr/338.jpg

lol.

[DrJones]

Ivory Tower - Valuing scholarship above all else, the inhabitants of the Ivory Tower reward those who sacrifice power for knowledge.

[freakish777]

Crimson Hellkite

Furnace Whelp

Standstill

http://sales.starcitygames.com/cardscans/MTG6TH/gorilla_chieftain.jpg

Monkey Monkey Monkey

Dark Ritual from Tempest: "If there is such a thing as too much power, I have not discovered it." - Volrath

[Pastorofmuppets]

Stifle
classic.

[B.C.]

"General?!" Tahngarth roared. "General nuisance, maybe."

"Gerrard: 'But it doesn't do anything!'
Hanna: 'No, it does nothing'."

[Broham]

Dwarven Miner

http://magiccards.info/scans/en/mr/169.jpg

I don't know why I like it so much, I just always have. I can picture the naughty dwarves so easily.

[Volrath]

This one complements the poltergeist.

http://wowbox.yatta.com.tw/mtg/images/largejpg/04XXX/04568.JPG

So then it we have:

The past is a ghost that haunts you from the moment it exists until the moment you don't

We often bury our pasts, and then someone comes along and digs them up.

[heroicraptor]

M10 Lightning Bolt

The sparkmage shrieked, calling on the rage of the storms of his youth. To his surprise, the sky responded with a fierce energy he'd never thought to see again.

[mossivo1986]

King cheetah anyone?

[sligh16]

http://magiccards.info/scans/en/po/122.jpg

loved it since always

[thickasabrick]

This has been my favorite for a long time:

http://www.coolstuffinc.com/images/Products/mtg%20art/Exodus/Spellbook.jpg

[dschalter]

Tolarian Academy, even though it's rather cheesy.

[SpatulaOfTheAges]

Bam.

http://i781.photobucket.com/albums/yy96/DoppelgangerIsI/eastern_paladin.jpg

http://i781.photobucket.com/albums/yy96/DoppelgangerIsI/western_paladin.jpg

http://i781.photobucket.com/albums/yy96/DoppelgangerIsI/will_o_the_wisp.jpg

http://i781.photobucket.com/albums/yy96/DoppelgangerIsI/carnival_of_souls.jpg

[Hanni]

Dark Confidant. I actually like the new Jace's Erasure, too.

[coraz86]

King Cheetah anyone?

QFT.

Related;Fodder Cannon, and the Mirrodin printing of Detonate. (Luckily the cards tag hits the Mirrodin one.) Goblins are not always the most entertaining deck to play against, but damn if they don't make for some good flavor text.

[vigilante]

There are plenty of better ones out there, but this one's pretty funny.

http://magiccards.info/scans/en/m11/140.jpg

Chub Toad lovers rejoice...another toad reference.

[(nameless one)]

M10 Lightning Bolt

The sparkmage shrieked, calling on the rage of the storms of his youth. To his surprise, the sky responded with a fierce energy he'd never thought to see again.

I actually like that too because the flavor text itself is a reflection of the card. I never thought I'd see a Lightning Bolt reprint after all those Shock reprints.

[Yan]

I have this one tattooed on my chest:

"Take your time."

:)

[DownSyndromeKarl]

"Play no favorites. Everybody dies."

Forked Bolt

[justMAD]

"I want a banana this big"

-Gorilla Titan

:)

[EssKay]

I used to play land destruction back in the day, so I suppose it's fitting that a couple of my favorites are Pillage and Icequake. Also, Boil is pretty brutal.

Aww damnit why do they print new flavor text? Pillage original:
Were they to reduce us to ash, we would clog their throats and sting their eyes in payment."
—Lovisa Coldeyes,
Balduvian Chieftain

Boil Original:
"The fishers will throw out their nets and draw them back filled with dust."
—Oracle en-Vec

[Versus]

Surprised no one mentioned this one yet.

Pyrexian Negator: "They exist to cease."

I'm also a fan of...

Counterspell (Tempest): "It was probably a lousy spell in the first place."

[MEATROCKET]

On a related note, my vote for worst flavor text is (other than Niv-Mizzet, the Firemind...) Kird Ape.

Kird Ape's flavor text should have been It puts the "ape" in "rape."

[DownSyndromeKarl]

On a related note, my vote for worst flavor text is (other than Niv-Mizzet, the Firemind...) Kird Ape.

Kird Ape's flavor text should have been It puts the "ape" in "rape."

how could you not like Niv-Mizzet's flavor? It's such a nerdcore joke.

I'ma gonna add that to my list of Favorites; Niv-Mizzet

[wmagzoo7]

"Amidst the darkest ashes grow the strongest seeds."- Crucible of Worlds

[menace13]

how could you not like Niv-Mizzet's flavor? It's such a nerdcore joke.

I'ma gonna add that to my list of Favorites; Niv-Mizzet

Agreed, Niv is awesome. The most inteliigent being evar proclaming he equals 1in a cryptic mathematical engineering code.. Isn't pretty cool?

[Malakai]

Near-Death Experience

Also the judge foil vindicate:
"Some convictions are strong that the world must break to accommodate them."

And of course:
"There is always a greater power."

[pippo84]

http://magiccards.info/scans/en/jvc/53.jpg

Probably not the best, but I always liked this one. :wink:

[pingveno]

Armadillo Cloak - Don't laugh, it works.

Pyroclasm - circa 10th Edition - When the air burns, only death breathes deep.

[Benjammn]

"I don't know why people say a double-edged sword is bad. It's a sword. With two edges."
-Kamahl, pit fighter
Manabarbs

[NesretepNoj]

http://magiccards.info/scans/en/wl/37.jpg

Pulp Fiction anyone?

...and of course Pernicious Deed in my sig.:

[Neuad]

Seismic Assault

and

Burning Wish

[heroicraptor]

The hound sniffed the air and let slip a low growl. General Takeno looked down at the faithful Isamaru and calmed him with a touch. "Alert the men. The kami are coming."

So evocative.

[The Wolf]

This has been my favorite since it came out:

Werebear - Flavor text: He exercises his right to bear arms.

[Jonathan Alexander]

Steamflogger Boss

And of course this one (http://magiccards.info/mr/en/27.html).

[Neuad]

M11 is offically out.

What cool flavor texts did you find?!

[Nonex]

Bloodthrone Vampire

"The underclass often forget that they are not tenants, or servants, but property."

[the Thin White Duke]

http://deckbox.org/system/images/mtg/cards/191056.jpg

Ha Ha classic!!
Also mentioned: Remand is actually my favorite.
Carnival of Souls is great. It makes me think of Marvin from "the Guide".

[Tortured Existence]

Once I dreamt of death, but now it dreams of me / and only rats and rotting flesh can hear my silent plea

[Oiolosse]

pernicious deed judge promo:

"The tyrannous and blood deed is done, The most arch deed of piteous massacre That ever yet this land was guilty of." --William Shakespeare, Richard III

Fissure

"Must not all things at the last be swallowed up in death?" --Plato

[ddt15]

Can't believe noone mentioned this yet;

Goblin Piledriver

[Michael Keller]

My two favorites:

http://findmagiccards.com/GF/USC/MTGC/DK/RAGZMAN1.jpeg

"Aw, he's just a silly, dirty little man. What's to be afraid of?"

http://findmagiccards.com/GF/USC/MTGC/LG/FIEFAMS1.jpeg

Some people say that the world is round, and if you travel far enough you'll come to the other side, where everything is upside down.

[SpikeyMikey]

Here, have a Mudhole.