Those perfectly silly magic jokes/puns at the start of every SCG Open

[feline]

I think the one I remember most was an emphasis on leaving drinks on the table, and Dark Confidants, I don't remember how it worked, it was in Portland back in September.

In either case, that's the one I remember most and I don't even remember how it goes, if you have one that stands out that you remember, share away. ^.^

and while for some reason the crowd is always a mixed reaction on those, I love that type of humor, so to the community & judges that share them before every big magic day at the Open Series, thank you, I always look forward to what I'll hear next.

[thecrav]

Keep your drinks off the table because we don't want any Tropicana Islands or Underground Teas - if we do, we might end up with a Contested Pour Zone.

[NesretepNoj]

Heard this one in the background of the coverage. In went something like this:

"Keep your drinks off the table so your Force of Wills don't become Force of Spills."

[Megadeus]

At the last two that I went to we heard Force of Spills and DeathSprite Shamans... Lol. Puns are the worst (best)

[Koby]

Don't want your Seachrome Coasts to become Seachrome Coasters. (Modern PTQs)
Don't want your Tropical Islands to become Tropical Punch.
etc

They're cute and harmless, but communicate a very important point. Don't be an idiot. Keep your Coffee Mocha Cocoa Latte Frappe off the table.

[phazonmutant]

They're also supposed to help humanize the judges to less experienced players so they'll feel more comfortable calling us if they need help. Often new players find judges very intimidating so a little joke helps break the ice. Lemme see if I can find a link to a judge conference presentation I attended about the HJ announcements where they gave some good puns...

[cogitoergosum]

People with losing problems might need a session of cabal therapy.

[Tammit67]

Make sure your Augur of Bolas doesn't become Augur of Colas!

<3 Jared Sylva

[Arsenal]

Some of these puns are quite clever actually. Props to the Judges.

[dontbiteitholmes]

Tabernacle of Ginger Ale

[Megadeus]

Tabernacle of Ginger Ale

This one is funny. Not only because of it being a great pun, but the thought of ginger ale spilling on a NM Tabernacle... Your face when that happens to you.

[Arsenal]

Tabernacle of Ginger Ale

Good one. I feel like there should be a pun involving Mountain Dew and Mountain/red spells, but I'm coming up blank here.

[dontbiteitholmes]

Good one. I feel like there should be a pun involving Mountain Dew and Mountain/red spells, but I'm coming up blank here.

Yeah not mine I heard it at an SCG.

[phazonmutant]

Here's the presentation: http://blip.tv/scglive/judge-conf-part-2-5828590
The part about puns starts around 7 minutes, then we made some terrible suggestions for a Bitterblossom pun around 9:20. All of them were real bad..

[ESG]

Heard at the most recent SCG Seattle: We don't want your Nimble Mongooses to become Nimble Mon-Juices.

Kind of a stretch, but some of the lamer ones draw the bigger laughs.

[feline]

I always try to cheer the judge nice and loud that says it if the crowd gives a mixed/booing kind of reaction!

[Risky]

I love seeing a thread like this. My favorites that I have thought up:
1) Tabernacle of Ginger Ale - San Jose Open, January 2011. This is probably my best pun, and ironically one of the least heard, so I really appreciate it showing up here. I personally never re-use my puns (although variations on a common root are fair game) because I want each event to be special. This is one that I may try again because only 150 players heard it the first time.
2) My second favorite requires a backstory. We had been running out the puns for the entire first half of the 2011 season. And it had built up quite the stir (I hope). At the Invitational in Indianapolis that summer, we had a bunch of players who had qualified by Top 8ing Opens, so they were all familiar with the pun system. I got up and said, "Food and drink off the table. We would hate for your Llawan, Cephalid Empresses to become... (pause to let them wonder what the pun could possibly be)... damaged." That was the first and best anti-pun.
3) "We would hate for your Underground Seas to become Watery Graves" - I thought this one up, but let my associate, Jennifery Dery deliver it. Watery Grave has been used in multiple situations on its own, but I thought this was its best use.

My favorites from others:
1) Force of Spill - I believe this one was Nicholas Sabin, originally in Memphis 2011. It has been overused since then, but it is an all-time best.
2) Abrupt Parfait - I wish I had been there for this one in Edison this February. I do not know who came up with it.
3) Seachrome Coaster - I want to say that this one was by Eric Levine in Richmond, our HJ.

[majikal]

Don't let your Thirst for Knowledge cause any Stains of Mephistopheles.

[Anarky87]

Keep food and drink off the table while playing. We wouldn't want your Knight of the Reliquary's to become Knight of the Relish-quary.

[Ziveeman]

At one of the Opens I went to, the judge used "Dark Coffee-dant."

[SummonLegend]

At one of the Opens I went to, the judge used "Dark Coffee-dant."

That's my favorite so far.

[Black Rain]

Back when Mental Mistep was first legal, I beleive at SCG Louisville he said, "Please keep all drinks off the table. We wouldn't want to have any Sierra Mist-steps today" hilarious lol:smile: