Problems carpooling to tournaments?

[revenge_inc]

This thread is mostly directed at those in the MTG community under 20 years of age, but could be relevant to more. Do any of you have parents that actively try to prevent you from carpooling to tournaments? Like in most MTG communities there are members who are in their 20s, 30s and even 40s. According to my parents, they don't trust what in their words are "old men who should be doing something better with their lives". (and when it comes to carpooling with anyone younger they don't trust their driving). Sorry if this comes off as a rant, but I'm tired of my parents who seem to think that I'm like some 13 year old girl who needs to be protected from strange men they don't know. I don't want to turn this thread into another "do those you know frown on MTG players" but has anyone had any similar problems?

Alternate question: Anyone have any bad experiences carpooling?

[Bryant Cook]

Once I turned 17 my parents quit caring, mainly because I started to win a lot more cash. Selling cards at these events also helps, just show them how much green you can make.

I'm not talking about weed.

[revenge_inc]

Once I turned 17 my parents quit caring, mainly because I started to win a lot more cash. Selling cards at these events also helps, just show them how much green you can make.

I'm not talking about weed.


LOL. To make a lot you have to spend a lot. That's business.

It's not a money issue to them. It's more of a trust issue I think. Like I can go out to a bar or party and come home drunk(mind you not "puking and passing out drunk") at 3 am and yet they won't let me carpool-like wtf?

[kirdape3]

You know how you beat that? Let your parents meet the person/people in the car with you beforehand. If they're not willing, then you're flat blown out, but that should go a long way towards letting you ride with someone.

[ForceofWill]

Or stopping you from riding with them...

[TeenieBopper]

You know how you beat that? Let your parents meet the person/people in the car with you beforehand. If they're not willing, then you're flat blown out, but that should go a long way towards letting you ride with someone.

Truth.

If I'm driving a long distance, I usually have the people crash at my house the night before. If someone else is driving and picking me up at the house, I usually have them arrive 5 or 10 minutes early. They can come in and have coffee or something and meet the 'rents.

Course, I never had any trouble getting to and from tourneys once I had my license. Once you turn 18, just give your parents the finger.

[Nihil Credo]

Once you turn 18, just give your parents the finger.
If you have your own car, that is.

Actually, scrap that: if you have your own house, that is.

[TeenieBopper]

If you have your own car, that is.

Actually, scrap that: if you have your own house, that is.

What the fuck ever. If your parents are seriously going to kick you out for carpooling to magic tournaments, then it's not worth the trouble living with them anyways and you should get out as fast as possible.

I'm assuming "carpooling" is for long distance tourneys, like NY to Virginia. In which case, just have them pick you up at your house and tell them you'll give them $5 extra for gas.

[revenge_inc]

If you have your own car, that is.

Actually, scrap that: if you have your own house, that is.

Ya, I'm 18 but basically I do not have my own car (let alone house)...and they're paying for my tuition so I can't just say screw you guys because they can seriously fuck with my financial situation.

Thanks for the advice so far. Keep it comin'.

[Bryant Cook]

Thanks for the advice so far. Keep it comin'.

Grow some balls? I just tell my parents what I'm doing. It's not really like, "Can i pwease go to VA?" It's "Yeah, I'm going to VA in two weeks I won't be home that weekend."

[TeenieBopper]

Grow some balls? I just tell my parents what I'm doing. It's not really like, "Can i pwease go to VA?" It's "Yeah, I'm going to VA in two weeks I won't be home that weekend."

What this kid said. I pretty much started doing that when i turned 17. Just don't be a stupid fucktard and get arrested or end up in the hospital with alcohol poisoning and eventually they'll come around.

[Di]

I'm the same way. Hell, I told my parents I was going to Columbus for the GP roughly 3-4 days before I left. They just asked some questions, like what I was doing, do I have enough money, who's driving, are hotel arrangements settled, etc. They really don't care much.


Course, I never had any trouble getting to and from tourneys once I had my license. Once you turn 18, just give your parents the finger

Neither did I. Of course, I did have trouble finding my own house. Granted, I was 15 at the time, but still.

[kirdape3]

Actually it's smarter for him to talk to his parents. Since they fundamentally have him by the balls financially, it's a lot better for him to have a reasoned discussion with them.

It's still 'okay I want this, can we make it happen', but going all out simply won't work because they can really screw him over.

[Bovinious]

My parents are pretty much the same way, they wont let me get a ride to places even moderately far if they dont know the person driving. Im 18 and have my own car (my dad owns it technically but im the only one who uses it) and Im not even allowed to drive to far away places myself because my dad either doesnt trust the car or doesnt trust me (prolly both) :rolleyes: So yeah, Ive basically given up trying to go to far away large-scale Legacy tourneys til Im in college, which will be next year, I havnt tried to get permission to go anywhere tho since I turned 18 but figure id get the same BS denial...So yeah, my suggestions are just wait it out til your out of their house or if you think you can get your parents to give in keep at it or like others said introduce them to the driver, that should appease most parents Id think.

[Bryant Cook]

We thank your parents.

[TeenieBopper]

We thank your parents.

[Tog]

Dude, my parents are exactly the same way. They hate me playing magic. They really regret having bought me my first set of magic cards from the Tempest era. Everytime I tell them I'm going to a tourney for the entire day, they grunt and complain for the next couple days. They glare at me and moan about me not growing up. When I got to college, I could do whatever, whenever. There's a good reason to get your education. You have your own living space and the best part is, you don't even have to pay for it.

[Jaynel]

I agree with the 'parents meeting people' business. It can put them at ease, especially if the people you're going with are relatively normal and/or eloquent.

[edgewalker]

Ba-zing!


Seriously, if your balls are in a vice because of your financial situation (like me) it still really doesn't matter. Hell my parent's don't like me even playing magic anymore (mainly why I haven't) They think it's childish and I should doing more grown up things like all the 18 year olds. However, they don't know what 90% of the 18 year olds that I know are high or drunk 90% of their day and to me track>getting shitfaced everyday (didn't say I don't like getting shitfaced) Hell, my parents don't even like me watching cartoons or playing video games because they're "childish" and I don't "fit in" if I do them. So basically, if you're parents show you propaganda film from the 1940's like mine do, you eventually need to tell them they're retarded. Worst case scenario, they throw you and be bad parents.

EDIT: This post my not make sense tomorrow because I may have had a little to drink.

[Bryant Cook]

Could be worse, you could be a fellon like your cousin (Di).

[edgewalker]

eh, no one really talks about that anymore from what I hear. I mean, it's not like her committed a real felon and burned something down or killed somebody, he just did the one that makes a shit ton of money.

[revenge_inc]

I agree with the 'parents meeting people' business. It can put them at ease, especially if the people you're going with are relatively normal and/or eloquent.
This seems to be the concensus. Next time I try and get a ride I'll be sure to introduce my folks to the driver.


If your parents are seriously going to kick you out for carpooling to magic tournaments, then it's not worth the trouble living with them anyways and you should get out as fast as possible.

There is no way they'd go that far, but they could stop paying for my textbooks and stop giving me money to buy clothes.

[Parcher]

You could always show them The Source. That might convince them that your peers have the intelligence and maturity that they desire.

[revenge_inc]

You could always show them The Source. That might convince them that your peers have the intelligence and maturity that they desire.


LOL, I'll pass (and I say this assuming I show it to them while no one is logged in so they can't see Mish-Mash).

[Janos_Wuryon]

Really this sounds like a perception problem. Your parents probably think there are 2 kinds of people playing magic, 12 year olds and fat, balding, 40year old pedophiles. Try introducing them to the reality of it. The game is a venue for 18-25 year olds, typically intelligent( save wasted life), educated people interested in a mentally challenging competitive experience. Your parents wouldnt think a second to pack you up and ship you off on a sports trip if you played in school. change their perception and it will be much easier to overcome.

one last note, if your 18 and worried about what your parents think you need to sack up and let them know you are not a child anymore... cut the umbilical cord...

[DeathwingZERO]

Or just tell them you're going to start playing Poker if you can't get rides to the Magic tournaments. They'll probably love the idea of you gambling all of your money away XD

[Adan]

Grow some balls? I just tell my parents what I'm doing. It's not really like, "Can i pwease go to VA?" It's "Yeah, I'm going to VA in two weeks I won't be home that weekend."

Quoted for truth.

You have to do it like wastedlife. I also do so (I'm currenly 17 btw.). And when you're 18, you should first try to score some girls with your ride before you drive to Magic Events.

[Nihil Credo]

What the fuck ever. If your parents are seriously going to kick you out for carpooling to magic tournaments, then it's not worth the trouble living with them anyways and you should get out as fast as possible.
I actually meant that for the "give them the finger" part. As in, it's going to be a lot easier to get their permission, but you still need it.

[conboy31]

According to my parents, they don't trust what in their words are "old men who should be doing something better with their lives".

That quote seems to be at the heart of the issue. It appears that something your parents have seen/heard/experienced has caused them to carry this assumption.

You could try approaching this from a few different ways. One would be to point out that they are judging these people that they never met and assigning subjective worth to their hobbies. From there you could go various directions based on their responses.

Another option would be to find one of the more successful magic car poolers [with decent social skills who knows what you are trying to accomplish] (by your parents standards) and have him/her talk to your parents about being able to play magic and still have gone/going to college or while holding a job or pursuing a career. This will probably not fit with their perceptions and may be useful.

Well, its like 30 below and I need to start my car for work. Let me know if any of that sounds feasible or I can try to come up with some other strategies.

[C.P.]

This thread is mostly directed at those in the MTG community under 20 years of age, but could be relevant to more. Do any of you have parents that actively try to prevent you from carpooling to tournaments?

I have Parents that Ripped 40+ duals plus various Old Extended Staples just because this is the game that involves CARDS therefore qualifies as gamble.

Since then (like, 7yrs ago), they have no clue that I'm still playing this fucking game. If you have problems, then hide the fact that you are carpooling. They even have no idea that I spend tons of time and money into this game and own 5000$+ collection.

Best player in hiding magic cards, according to my friends.

[n00bas4urus_r3x]

You basically have to tell them you know the people you're going with (I'm assuming you do), and that there is nothing to worry about, and they need to let you do shit you want to. Telling them there's a reliable car, good driver, etc. always helps too.

My mom used to be a super hard ass about this kind of stuff, like no rides home from school with student drivers (THEY'LL SWERVE OFF THE ROAD AND YOU'LL DIE!), no going over to friend's houses unless parents were home, all that crap. I of course did all these things and if she found out she'd pull my driving privileges for like a month or something like that. Eventually I blew up at her in a restaurant over dinner when she was ragging on me, and told her she was commonly referred to as Nazi Mom in my circle of friends. I think she realized then that some of the things I was doing weren't bad, and she got a lot better.

[raharu]

In all verity, it depends upon the person. My mother and I are pretty much like n00bas4urus_r3x's situation, except that I've blown up in her face so many times that it's not funny. Like 100. In public, private, in front of my dad (divorced parents), step-dad, at family reunions and gatherings of friends. She's too dense to get it. My father has gone on her (pretty much out of nowhere because she said something off-color). She'll never get it. What happened is my dad and I just skirt around her and do whatever. Find a way around them if you can, it's really the best way in most situations if you keep the deception going.

[FoolofaTook]

You know how you beat that? Let your parents meet the person/people in the car with you beforehand. If they're not willing, then you're flat blown out, but that should go a long way towards letting you ride with someone.


As a 46 year old player I have to say that I'm really not interested in meeting the parents of somebody I play against competitively. I'm really not interested in taking responsibility for somebody else's children either.

The thing that's mind-blowing to me is that so few of the Magic players I face off against are even in their post-college years. Something really bad has happened to this community over the last decade, because when I left it in 1998 the average opponent I faced off against was a post-doc or a late twenty-something professional and there were a lot of mid 30's guys like me playing. There were a bunch of teenagers and under-grads playing also but probably only like a third of the population was in that category, now it's like 75%+ as near as I can tell.

To the original point: as a person who respects Magic players I would have to know the adult driver of a carpool by more than a passing reference before I let my son go to a tournament with them. I absolutely would not allow my daughter to travel with them unless I knew them personally.

That's just being a normal parent.

[Nightmare]

I was gonna give you some advice, but it boils down to:

Sucks to be you, dude.

[ApokalypseKid9]

nightmare = truth

But you're in college right? So how the fuck will they know if you carpool?

[matelml]

I have Parents that Ripped 40+ duals plus various Old Extended Staples just because this is the game that involves CARDS therefore qualifies as gamble.

Since then (like, 7yrs ago), they have no clue that I'm still playing this fucking game. If you have problems, then hide the fact that you are carpooling. They even have no idea that I spend tons of time and money into this game and own 5000$+ collection.

Best player in hiding magic cards, according to my friends.
:eek:

[zulander]

Wow. Reading this thread has made me realize how spoiled and immature many people here really are. So you can't go to a magic tournament, yeah let's yell and scream like little babies at your parents because they're trying to do their job and protect you. OMFG HOW DARE THEY, THOSE BASTARDS!!!

Seriously, talk to your parents respectfully and if they say no then just deal with it. Flipping out at your parents is very silly and immature, and if anything you'll just be proving their point more.



I've blown up in her face so many times that it's not funny. Like 100. In public, private, in front of my dad (divorced parents), step-dad, at family reunions and gatherings of friends. She's too dense to get it.

Oh wow, you're cool. You yell at your mom in public and "blow up in her face". Way to be a mature adult. Seriously, congratulations.

Having respect for your parents is something everyone should have, unless you've been abused (physically/emotionally etc...) and in this case you should contact the police/child services.

You kids suck, seriously.

[Bovinious]

Wow. Reading this thread has made me realize how spoiled and immature many people here really are. So you can't go to a magic tournament, yeah let's yell and scream like little babies at your parents because they're trying to do their job and protect you. OMFG HOW DARE THEY, THOSE BASTARDS!!!

Seriously, talk to your parents respectfully and if they say no then just deal with it. Flipping out at your parents is very silly and immature, and if anything you'll just be proving their point more.




Oh wow, you're cool. You yell at your mom in public and "blow up in her face". Way to be a mature adult. Seriously, congratulations.

Having respect for your parents is something everyone should have, unless you've been abused (physically/emotionally etc...) and in this case you should contact the police/child services.

You kids suck, seriously.


QFT, some of yall need to QQ less. Even if your parents are wrongfully worried, fighting them on it probably wont get you anywhere and in most cases you will be out on your own/in college soon anyways so its not like you can never go to tourneys, I have a feeling Legacy will still be here in a few years. My advice would be to play in local tourneys as much as you can or even other formats, extended is looking quite a bit like Legacy these days, with everyone going on about "Tarmogoyf this or Counterbalance that", so thats always an option.

[quicksilver]

Grow some balls?

All I can picture is you surrounded by hooters girls and being incredibly nervous and awkward.

[revenge_inc]

And when you're 18, you should first try to score some girls with your ride before you drive to Magic Events.

My ride? Why do you think I want to carpool?


So how the fuck will they know if you carpool?

It comes down to what zulander says, my parents don't really bother me and I can go where I wan't but all they really ask is that I let them know where I am. In any situation where I would need to carpool I would be gone long enough that I would have to explain where I'm going. (or get shit because I was gone all day and they didn't know where I was). I consider it simple respect to tell my parents where I am going if they ask (mutual respect is best in the long run). The problem is not the fact that I am going to tournaments (my dad even paid for my Greyhound ticket for GP Montreal because he didn't want me carpooling), it is the carpooling outside the city issue. It is just a lack of trust towards random people they don't know. It is the only current limitation on my otherwise freedom.

[Nightmare]

Have people over to your house to playtest when your parents are home. This makes it possible for them to meet some of the people that you're potentially riding with, and when it comes time for a roadtrip, the conversation is more like this:

"Mom, I'd like to go on a roadtrip to play Magic."
"Where is it and how do you plan to get there?"
"Its at X, and Jimmy is driving. You remember him, he's been over here a few times to play cards."
"That kid that eats all my food? He seems ok. Sure, you can go, but call me every fifteen minutes so I know your anal virginity is still intact."
"Mom, you know it hasn't been since that time you went after me with the broom."
"Oh yeah, I remember. Sometimes my mind slips. You know how I love huffing ether!"
"Oh, mom."

[The Wes]

Ether? Well La De Da, arn't we all fancy. My mom has to make do with WD40.

[revenge_inc]

Have people over to your house to playtest when your parents are home. This makes it possible for them to meet some of the people that you're potentially riding with, and when it comes time for a roadtrip, the conversation is more like this:

"Mom, I'd like to go on a roadtrip to play Magic."
"Where is it and how do you plan to get there?"
"Its at X, and Jimmy is driving. You remember him, he's been over here a few times to play cards."
"That kid that eats all my food? He seems ok. Sure, you can go, but call me every fifteen minutes so I know your anal virginity is still intact."
"Mom, you know it hasn't been since that time you went after me with the broom."
"Oh yeah, I remember. Sometimes my mind slips. You know how I love huffing ether!"
"Oh, mom."


Good advice (and a nice humourous touch I might add).