Obligatory shitty card creation thread

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11-05-2009, 12:05 AM
TotallySweet

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Tiny Annoying Doodad :1:

Artifact Creature - Doodad

Whenever you shuffle your library, you may have target opponent shuffle his or her library.
Whenever a player shuffles his or her library, Tiny Annoying Doodad deals 1 damage to them.

"I wish I could hate you to death."
1/1

o_O
11-05-2009, 12:15 AM
Hiis

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Deadly Storm of Death :1: :r: :r: :r:

Sorcery

Deadly Storm of Death deals 5 damage to all creatures.

Go go mono red control :laugh:
11-05-2009, 12:43 AM
Phoenix Ignition

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by TotallySweet

Tiny Annoying Doodad :1:

Artifact Creature - Doodad

Whenever you shuffle your library, you may have target opponent shuffle his or her library.
Whenever a player shuffles his or her library, Tiny Annoying Doodad deals 1 damage to them.

"I wish I could hate you to death."
1/1

o_O

Ahahahaha this is freaking sweet! Make it a mythic rare just to spite people even more. This would be such a fun card to build a deck around (along with the other damage-shuffler card). Crappy deck, yes, but so much win.
11-05-2009, 12:58 AM
heroicraptor

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phoenix Ignition

Would certainly make Wild Mongrel playable again... lol...

No it wouldn't. "Players can't discard cards." is a different statement from "If a player would discard a card, instead they don't." The first stops Wild Mongrel's ability, the second makes Wild Mongrel a Graham's Number/Graham's Number.
11-05-2009, 01:22 AM
Phoenix Ignition

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by heroicraptor

No it wouldn't. "Players can't discard cards." is a different statement from "If a player would discard a card, instead they don't." The first stops Wild Mongrel's ability, the second makes Wild Mongrel a Graham's Number/Graham's Number.

Oops, misread it.

In that case I wouldn't probably run it, for fear of AdN going nuts on me with 4 Black Lotus.
11-05-2009, 01:30 AM
Aggro_zombies

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phoenix Ignition

Oops, misread it.

In that case I wouldn't probably run it, for fear of AdN going nuts on me with 4 Black Lotus.

I don't think that works either, since discarding is also part of LED's activation cost. Having it be a mana ability doesn't change the fact that you can't pay the cost for it.

EDIT: "Sacrifice Lion's Eye Diamond, Discard your hand: Add three mana of any one color to your mana pool. Activate this ability only any time you could cast an instant."
11-05-2009, 01:58 AM
Phoenix Ignition

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

So it would be a static ability? Or a replacement effect? If it's a replacement effect LED would still work right?
11-05-2009, 02:26 AM
TotallySweet

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

It's not a replacement, otherwise it would read: If a player would discard a card, he or she doesn't instead.
11-05-2009, 02:52 AM
Maveric78f

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phoenix Ignition

Would certainly make Wild Mongrel playable again... lol...

I really thought it was sarcasm. I found it funny. I'm sad it wasn't.

And yes, Barook is the best card designer of this thread. I had already noticed it.
11-05-2009, 06:40 AM
Barook

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maveric78f

And yes, Barook is the best card designer of this thread. I had already noticed it.

Thanks.

I just realized that the card would also have broken possibilities with blue draw that discards afterwards. Breakthorugh would be basically an Ancestral Recall on steroids.
11-05-2009, 06:46 AM
Maveric78f

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barook

Thanks.

I just realized that the card would also have broken possibilities with blue draw that discards afterwards. Breakthorugh would be basically an Ancestral Recall on steroids.

Yeah. Let me take back what I said. You're a bad designer after all ^^.

The wording could be:
Opponents can't discard.
If a spell or ability an opponent controls would cause you to discard a card, instead you don't.
11-05-2009, 07:14 AM
Barook

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maveric78f

Yeah. Let me take back what I said. You're a bad designer after all ^^.

The wording could be:
Opponents can't discard.
If a spell or ability an opponent controls would cause you to discard a card, instead you don't.

I don't think it would broken enough to change the effect. Most of those cards aren't good enough for themselves. It would also ruin the entire symmetry thing.
11-05-2009, 08:11 AM
(nameless one)

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by quicksilver

It's like llanowar elves, except that it gives 1 mana first turn, 2 mana second turn, 3 mana third turn etc.... While at the same time improving your draws by removing land. If it put it into your hand I would say it would be balanced.

I actually dont mind if the land (or basic land for balanced purposes) is put into hand. Although if a card like that were to see print, It might enable a new Parfait archetype.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barook

Anti-discard Dude :w::w:
Creature - Human Cleric
Whenever a player discards a card, exile it instead. At the beginning of each player's end step, return those cards to their owner's hand.
2/2

Not sure how to word it exactly, but it should work like this:
Hose discard like Hymn or Thoughtseize on the one hand, but also stuff that requires discard as additional or activation cost (e.g. Survival, LED, etc.).

Fixed or more broken?

Quote:

Originally Posted by TotallySweet

Tiny Annoying Doodad :1:

Artifact Creature - Doodad

Whenever you shuffle your library, you may have target opponent shuffle his or her library.
Whenever a player shuffles his or her library, Tiny Annoying Doodad deals 1 damage to them.

"I wish I could hate you to death."
1/1

o_O

A card that could break Cosi's Trickster! could...
11-05-2009, 08:51 AM
santeria

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by TotallySweet

Tiny Annoying Doodad :1:

Artifact Creature - Doodad

Whenever you shuffle your library, you may have target opponent shuffle his or her library.
Whenever a player shuffles his or her library, Tiny Annoying Doodad deals 1 damage to them.

"I wish I could hate you to death."
1/1

o_O

creature ? it should probably be in the rack/vise/doll family.
11-05-2009, 10:18 AM
TotallySweet

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

I mercifully made it a creature so that it would be easier to kill. I mean you can already trinket mage it up...
11-05-2009, 11:25 AM
Barook

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by (nameless one)

Anti-discard Dude :w::w:
Creature - Human Cleric
Whenever a player discards a card, exile it instead. At the beginning of each player's end step, return those cards to their owner's hand.
2/2

More broken and completely misses the point. It should hose discard AND cards that require discard as costs - your card still hoses discard, but makes the latter cards that don't rely on their graveyard even better. E.g. when you discard your dudes to survival, you get also get the discarded creatures back - it would be basically a better Squee. It also breaks Cycling in halfs.

I really don't see why the blue discard-draw is suddenly a problem in a format where you can get two-mana two-card combos that do far more broken things for you.
11-05-2009, 01:28 PM
umbowta

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barook

Anti-discard Dude :w::w:
Creature - Human Cleric
Players can't discard cards.
2/2

Not sure how to word it exactly, but it should work like this:
Hose discard like Hymn or Thoughtseize on the one hand, but also stuff that requires discard as additional or activation cost (e.g. Survival, LED, etc.).

How about

Eternal Shepherd :w::w:
Legendary Creature - Human Cleric
Whenever target opponent would discard a card, exile it instead. If a spell or ability an opponent controls causes you to discard a card you may return target card from your graveyard to your hand.

At the beginning of your upkeep, if Eternal Shepherd is in your graveyard, you may pay :w::3: to return Eternal Shepherd to your hand.
2/2
11-05-2009, 02:04 PM
johanessen

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by umbowta

Whenever target opponent would discard a card, exile it instead.

Whenever an opponent discards a card, exile it instead of putting into it's owner's graveyard.

Is that better?
11-05-2009, 02:05 PM
Nihil Credo

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

To the best of my knowledge, "players can't discard cards" works fine as a wording, just like "players can't gain life" (Sulfuric Vortex) or "players can't search their library" (Mindlock Orb).

In all of those cases, effects that cause those actions instead do nothing, and costs involving those actions can't be paid.

For balancing purposes, I'd just add the ability: "Players* can't draw more than one card each turn", unless there is some cheap pseudo-drawing + discard spell I forgot about.

* Could be "you", but the symmetry is more elegant.
11-05-2009, 03:43 PM
umbowta

Re: Cards you'd like to see WotC print for Eternal reasons

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nihil Credo

To the best of my knowledge, "players can't discard cards" works fine as a wording, just like "players can't gain life" (Sulfuric Vortex) or "players can't search their library" (Mindlock Orb).

In all of those cases, effects that cause those actions instead do nothing, and costs involving those actions can't be paid.

For balancing purposes, I'd just add the ability: "Players* can't draw more than one card each turn", unless there is some cheap pseudo-drawing + discard spell I forgot about.

* Could be "you", but the symmetry is more elegant.

So at EOT what do I do with the 8th card in my hand?

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