I am getting smug satisfaction from reading this :cool:
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I am getting smug satisfaction from reading this :cool:
Some time ago I was a very bad loser when playing MtG... the last time I went on tilt was when I played against Stefan. I played Canadian Thresh and he a UBg Painter thingy with only 1 Grindstone maindeck and 2 Trinket Mages to find it. He randomly won 2-0 by topdecking that Grindstone twice and I just remember I was throwing my pen through the room... But it didn't hit anyone fortunately.
The other funny reaction I saw at Hassloch was when Ralf (playing Burn) won against Harry (Threshold/w with Countertop). Ralf is actually a wrestler with a corresponding physique and he lives nearby, that's why we are both testing from time to time and I always win like 18-2 against him with CountertopThreshold.
When he won against Harry, he was shouting like a "YEEEHA" and slapping the table so hard that all the cards and dices bounced off the table.
You could see how intimidated Harry was, his expression was like O_O
and his eyes turned glossy. That was hilarious.
As far as I can remember, Pinder captured the game state and smug-osity perfectly.Quote:
Originally Posted by TheInfamousBearAssassin
I got verbally abused three games in two different matches in the same Hadley tourny, which was hilarious.
I think rockout was next to me when I was told to "Shut the fuck up" for saying "must be nice" when my opponent blind-flipped U. Sea to Bob when he was low on life.
The second and third times were while I was playing versus Dreadstill. I got called a lucksack for having more counters against a turn 2 Naught, and I got told I was a fucking terrible scrub who played terrible cards because I vialed in Morphling with my Merfolk deck to win Game 3.
When I was like 12-14 age I almost got all my stuff stolen because I traded a guy a Jitte for 5 dollars then bought a back of Betrayers and pulled a Jitte out of it. The guy was 35+, and had his girlfriend with him. I won.
And I'm getting guilty pleasure :cry:Quote:
Originally Posted by sauce
Well, since this thread is at the top and I have a non-dramadramadrama story to add.
Yesterday I was playing at a tournament where there were equal numbers of newby type 2 decks and fine tuned 1.5 decks (we were playing legacy rules).
First round I trash a type 2 deck piloted by a mom with a baby. I was polite in explaining rules like how instants work and why my Qasali Pridemage can take out a Tidehollow Skuller even though he isn't an enchantment (...?). Anyway, after she sort of blew up when I beat her, she went off and I didn't see her until the next match.
Her opponent finished her off quickly, but this time she had to throw a huge tantrum in front of her kid, started bawling, screaming stuff... I remember "I hope you're happy for making a mother cry!"
God... using her baby as leverage to try to manipulate people into feeling bad about fairly beating her.
Needless to stay after she stormed off we all rightly burst into laughter.
Should've fucked her.
I don't know why everyone's getting so riled. Everyone has done something like this at some point. Here, I'll tell one of mine.
Semi-final of GPT Chicago. My Ichorid vs. Kehoe with Survival.
My opening hand is fucking insane with Coliseum, LED, DA, Breakthrough an two dredgers. Only one discard outlet, and me on the draw though.
K: Thoughtseize.
D: Fuck.
K: LED. Go.
D: Fucking lucksack. (I lose after no discard outlet for four turns)
D: I had the first turn win guaranteed if you didn't have that fucking four of.
J: Yeah. No, Therapy would've worked.
D: What? How, I was on the draw.
J: So?
D: So after you take Breakthrough, I play LED and Coliseum, cast DA, activate Coliseum and win.
J: I always name LED against Ichorid on the play.
D: Bullshit.
J: Seriously.
D: Then you're a retard. Breakthrough and Coliseum are the only cards you can't outrace since you have Jailer and Macabre. And you can't take Coliseum. Only a moron would name LED. You lucksack.
Game two, I keep a decent hand with two Firestorm, Land, Breakthrough, and a dredger.
D: Land, Go. (thinking to Firestorm his Bird or whatever, and Breakthrough on my turn)
J: Therapy. I'll name Breakthrough.
D:[random stream of cursing and screaming resulting in my getting a warning]
I lost that one too. But just to Kehoe topdecking a Witness when he would of been one mana short of Survivaling for it. By that point I was whined out and didn't even bitch any more. Just scooped up and walked.
Oh, and Pinder is a big fat liar. Jack never did any of that.
Something to the chime of "I'll let you beat me if I get to take you out back" sounds about right.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bryant Cook
p.s. I feel like such a whore today. . .
-Moss
Then we mentioned that the phrase "must be nice," and laughs were had by many. It was actually Dan Jordan that said he wanted to kick my ass for saying the phrase. He can go die for all I care threatening us for no reason.Quote:
Originally Posted by Paradigm Shift
I just noticed this.Quote:
Originally Posted by Magic Fanatic
On the topic of breast feeding. Heather Graham in The Hangover, awesome tit(s).
Truth.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bryant Cook
This. It would have been pleasing.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bryant Cook
I remember that game. I honestly thought you were gonna pull a Jack Elgin on me... Well you kinda didQuote:
Originally Posted by Parcher
I'm positive I've heard kirdape3 telling someone with a completely straight face (and he actually meant it) that he hoped they died in a car fire. I think he had just lost to mono-blue control with Ichorid....
You screaming at me, "What!!? Scoop!! You have no way to win!!!" at the Anniversary Tournament, when you were actually wrong, was borderline behavior yourself there buddy.Quote:
Originally Posted by freakish777
Man this thread is amazing, sadly I don't have the epic quality of stories that some people here do (tits) but I'll just share one anyway.
It was a saturday and we were doing some casual multiplayer games when some dude walks into the shop who I've never seen before. Apparently he was a friend of one of the guys so whatever, we start playing and he draws an extra card.
So one of the guys asks him 'how many cards are you holding?' and he's like 'seven' answered by 'sure, let me count them then'.
At this point he repeats ...how many cards are you holding? And suddenly he starts shouting the same phrase like five times 'HOW MANY CARDS? HOW MANY CARDS AM I HOLDING?' proceeds to pack his bag and storms off.
:rolleyes:
Laughs were had by all.
That reminds me of last tournament. I played Merfolk, my opponent Landstill. He regularly asked how many cards I was holding. At a certain point in the game he Path to Exiled one of my creatures. As I was searching my deck for an Island he asked how many cards I was holding. I presented him with the deck "count yourself". Not bad behaviour, but I thought it's a funny anecdote and I thought I'd share :smile:.
Oh, another situation I remember was back then when Fabian and I were playing ITF. Fabian had to play against Florian who is like one of the worst slowplayers.
So at some point during their match, Fabian took out his cell phone and played Tetris while Florian was still making hsi turn (he played Aggroloam and always considered things like "Shall I dredge/draw, shall I cycle this or that land and blah). The judge was laughing and Florian then complained that he should follow the match, but Fabian then just shouted "THEN HURRY THE FUCK UP, I'M CLOSE TO FALL ASLEEP!!!" right into his face.
It was game 2 and Fabian lost 1-0. He was boiling seriously.
I've got the story of a friend who was 7-1 by a PT and got a game loss after a deck check. His guess is that the opponent of the previous round stole him a card and then denounced him to a judge.
There is one person who frequents my area who is infamous for having a bad temper; he is a serious sore loser and most people in the area don't even bother playing him anymore (I think he's been banned from the store like twice, but the owner keeps letting him come back in because he buys so much shit).
His phrase of choice is "dick move" . Playing a vindicate when he only has one land is a "dick move" Anything that puts you in a winning situation is a "dick move". Whenever he says it he tries to stare you down, its funny.
I remember the first time I played him. B/W deadguy against his elf deck (2 maindeck engineered plague 2 SB'd and SB'd perishes). Game one I play a plague, "dick move man, only a bitch would play that card". I win that game. Next game I SB in perishes, he sees this and asks me if I want to fight about it (lol). I'm having too much fun at this smuchs expence so not only do I play two plagues but precede to perish the one elf he has left in play. He slams his grip of cards down on the table, gives me a major stink eye, and somewhat loudly calls me a bitch. I then laugh him off and go get something to eat with some friends.
I think he was finally banned for good when he lost a game of worms and threw an xbox controller at the wall....
Poor guy. He must have no life at all.
I ask my opponent how many cards they have in hand fairly often just to make sure they don't draw extra cards and so I don't openly give away that I drew a discard spell. Also, it helps to play spells when your opponent has 1 or 2 cards in hand versus a full grip. I don't think you were being bad or annoying.Quote:
Originally Posted by Skeggi
I second that.Quote:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bryant Cook View Post
I just noticed this.
On the topic of breast feeding. Heather Graham in The Hangover, awesome tit(s).
Truth.
How many cards were you holding? Come on, tell me.Quote:
Originally Posted by Skeggi
Guilty as charged. Me not having food is bad times.Quote:
Originally Posted by Parcher
You guys are dicks.
I'm always a citadel of tranquility.
True StoryQuote:
Originally Posted by SpatulaOfTheAges
Ok so there used to be a local store in my hometown where we would all play constructed type 2 every friday for small prizes and such.
We had these two little korean kids come in one Friday, and we all thought they would be some nub kids with terrible decks, but one played Momentary Blink and the other played Gruul Aggro. So this guy we play with loses to the 7 year old girl, and calls a judge because she used the bathroom to "waste" time, and then proceeds to slam his deck down, and complain about women's periods.
>.<
Check this out:Quote:
Originally Posted by Loxodon Baileyarch
One time I ran out to get some smokes for the store owner as he was incredibly busy and I was in between rounds. So as im comming back the judge of the event calls me on my cell phone and tells me ive got 6 minutes before Im late. I get there in time win game 1, then just barely lose game 2 and my opponent goes GG. Im like what? Apparently I got a game loss that I was never informed on. What a shitty way to lose a round of magic. the worst part was my opponent was a dick anyways.
So obviously I explained the entire situation and the TO was like, ch not my problem so I talked to the Store owner and hes like that sucks. Shouldnt have run to the store for me I guess.
Needless to say I dont play dci sanctioned there anymore. It was bullshit.
Did I? I always had a knack for that. Seriously though, this is the second time in two days that someone has typed 'Pinder' instead of 'Parcher'. I just found it interesting, carry on.Quote:
Originally Posted by Peter_Rotten
woowQuote:
Originally Posted by mossivo1986
That needs to be a Magic card. Somebody get on it.Quote:
Originally Posted by SpatulaOfTheAges
Did anyone beat the shit out of him for being a sexist asshole?Quote:
Originally Posted by Loxodon Baileyarch
No shit. Also, in general 7 year-old girls don't get periods. Maybe the two issues were unrelated.Quote:
Originally Posted by TeenieBopper
I love that after 6 pages of idiots talking about sucking on titties, NOW you go into White Knight mode.Quote:
Originally Posted by TeenieBopper
I actually haven't been reading this thread for fear of seeing myself mentioned. I just saw that particular post in the Quotes thread and had to comment.Quote:
Originally Posted by SpatulaOfTheAges
Ask and ye shall recieve. Just a short one.Quote:
Originally Posted by TeenieBopper
Edinger: Oh wait. Oh fuck. OH FUCK!!! Oh my fucking god. I suck. I can't believe I fucking missed that! Are you fucking kidding me?! FUCK! I'm the worst fucking player alive!!
Eli: Yes.(long thoughtful pause) Yes you are.
Well i mean, he is 7 feet, 400 pounds. And i'm like 6'1, 180, so i would just get crushed.
But he did get like the whole, losing all the friends he had at the shop, treatment.
Edit: Is it me, or is all the PTQ level magic players fucking pricks? Bc i live in GA, and the shop i play at includes some of GA's finest players, and they are all fucking dicks. Like all of them.
I was in the top 4 of Shadowmoor limited PTQ qualifier, and i was playing GW aggro, i had drafted a bunch of just fat nasty shit, and i'm playing this azn kid, who is the store favorite(they jerk off to his magic playing), and i'm beating his ass, and it's game three, and i got jewed because of some lifelink ruling, and come to find out, the judge is this guy's buttbuddy, and saw him misplay and didn't call anything on it. I was so fucking pissed. You have no idea. I was supposed to go to Indianapolis to fucking play in a big Legacy event too. Pisses me off so bad.
Edit:Edit:Fuck Nassif Level Blue too.
Does this individual show up to play weekly Legacy?Quote:
Originally Posted by Loxodon Baileyarch
I got a rude kid last night.
he drafted at his regular shop and showed up for a late night session at mine.
1st pack he pass's me a baneslayer angel - I take it of course since it is $10 in store credit
2nd pack he pass's me a foil dual land (the lotus picture one)
3rd pack I rare drafted also because it was something i needed for a set
after it is all said and done he wins and gets mad because we don't re-draft the rares we have a firm idea that if you want money from a draft then draft the money cards if you want to win then draft a winning deck but you keep what you draft.
He gets mad throws his draft deck down on the table and leaves
Honestly I do understand where he is coming from because he passed all his money at least another draft if not 2