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Thread: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

  1. #2021

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Phyrexian Dread's Shadow
    :BP: Creature Phyrexian Dreadnought Avatar
    Trample
    When Phyrexian Dread's Shadow enters the battlefield, sacrifice it unless you sacrifice any number of creatures with total power 25 or greater.
    Phyrexian Dread's Shadow gets -X/-X, where X is your life total.
    25/25

  2. #2022

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    How about this for a bad idea:

    Mass Confusion
    Instant
    RRR
    Copy and exile any number of spells or abilities. The copies are controlled by the controllers of the original spells and abilities.

  3. #2023

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by rufus View Post
    How about this for a bad idea:

    Mass Confusion
    Instant
    RRR
    Copy and exile any number of spells or abilities. The copies are controlled by the controllers of the original spells and abilities.
    Why would I want a worse Display of Power?

    But also without "target" it can copy itself and go off forever.
    But also it doesn't do anything because exiling a spell counters it, and without an explicit say-so no targets will be changed? I suppose it changes the resolution order to resolve all of the non-active player's spells first?

    Put this one back in the kitchen. Needs to bake a little longer.

  4. #2024

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by FourDogsinaHorseSuit View Post
    ...
    But also without "target" it can copy itself and go off forever.
    ...
    Yeah, it should definitely have included an "other".

    But also it doesn't do anything because exiling a spell counters it, and without an explicit say-so no targets will be changed? I suppose it changes the resolution order to resolve all of the non-active player's spells first?
    It changes resolution order and can mess with stuff that targets spells. (It does also hit non-instant/sorcery stuff though that's probably a color pie fail.)

    Put this one back in the kitchen. Needs to bake a little longer.
    Yeah, that's an accurate assessment.

  5. #2025
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    As I read it, thinking it would be some sort of "hurts itself in confusion" type of effect, you could do like a stack Warp World type of thing.

    "Exile all other spells and abilities. For each spell or ability exiled this way, choose a player at random. Copy that spell or ability and the chosen player gains control of that copy. They may choose new targets."

    Maybe I gain control of half of your Mind's Desire piles? Weird to have Flusterstorm copies targeting other Flusterstorm copies, but we don't know which way is up, how are we supposed to know better?
    Quote Originally Posted by GreatWhale View Post
    Gross, other formats. I puked in my mouth a little.

  6. #2026
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    The cards in this thread are too stronk. Need to combine more good abilities.

    Chubby Phyrexian Squire 1W
    Creature - Phyrexian Toad Soldier
    Trample
    When this enters the battlefield, sacrifice it unless you sacrifice any number of creatures with total power 3 or greater.
    When this becomes blocked, it gets +2/+2 until end of turn.
    "He eats everything in sight, including his own sergeant"
    1/2

  7. #2027

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by FTW View Post
    The cards in this thread are too stronk. Need to combine more good abilities.

    Chubby Phyrexian Squire 1W
    Creature - Phyrexian Toad Soldier
    Trample
    When this enters the battlefield, sacrifice it unless you sacrifice any number of creatures with total power 3 or greater.
    When this becomes blocked, it gets +2/+2 until end of turn.
    "He eats everything in sight, including his own sergeant"
    1/2
    Give it devour 2 and have it trigger if it didn't

  8. #2028

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Now!

    Instant
    Resolve target spell or ability.
    If there were no other spells or abilities targeting that spell or ability, draw a card.

  9. #2029
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Lol blue just gets everything
    Quote Originally Posted by GreatWhale View Post
    Gross, other formats. I puked in my mouth a little.

  10. #2030

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by PirateKing View Post
    Lol blue just gets everything
    The secret is I put cycling on Dispel.

  11. #2031

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by FourDogsinaHorseSuit View Post
    Now!

    Instant
    Resolve target spell or ability.
    If there were no other spells or abilities targeting that spell or ability, draw a card.
    That seems a bit stronger than dispel vs stuff like flusterstorm or cursecatcher effects.

    The red version would be something like:

    Resolve

    Instant
    Split Second (As long as this spell is on the stack, players can't cast spells or activate abilities that aren't mana abilities.)
    All other spells and abilities gain split second.
    Discard a card then draw a card.

    Which would probably be unplayable outside of dredge decks.

  12. #2032
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Here's a card I mused on while watching a combo player masturbate in public

    Mana Abolish

    Instant
    Split Second
    Empty all mana pools.
    If 1 or more mana was emptied this way, draw a card.

    Float a bunch of mana and cast Burning Wish? Yeah one sec, hold this for me.
    Float your own mana and cycle it if you're desperate.
    Quote Originally Posted by GreatWhale View Post
    Gross, other formats. I puked in my mouth a little.

  13. #2033
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Also Trolling Burning Wish combo players, along the same lines as a previous idea

    Hurry Up!
    Instant
    Whenever a player casts a spell, if that player has cast 3 or more other spells this turn, you may reveal this from your hand and cast it for . If you do, this gains "split second".

    Resolve target spell you don't control. That spell's controller may only cast 2 more noncreature spells this turn as long as no creatures have attacked.

    "Your turn's lasted 10 minutes..." - Raging Goblin



    Forcing Burning Wish to resolve before they can crack LED, or trolling other combo stack shenanigans.
    Last edited by FTW; 03-08-2024 at 02:29 PM.

  14. #2034
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    The Deputy WW
    Creature - Human Soldier
    Hexproof from black instants
    Lieutenant - T: Destroy target Outlaw creature.
    "I shot the sheriff, but I did not shoot the deputy"
    2/2
    Last edited by FTW; 06-10-2024 at 10:19 AM.

  15. #2035

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by FTW View Post
    The Deputy WW
    Creature - Human Soldier
    Hexproof from spells
    Lieutenant - T: Destroy target Outlaw creature.
    "I shot the sheriff, but I did not shoot the deputy"
    2/2
    They already made this joke.
    So yours should be an instant to match it.

  16. #2036
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by FourDogsinaHorseSuit View Post
    They already made this joke.
    So yours should be an instant to match it.
    They made Shoot the Sheriff.
    This one can't be targeted by shot, because they did not shoot the Deputy

  17. #2037

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Quote Originally Posted by FTW View Post
    They made Shoot the Sheriff.
    This one can't be targeted by shot, because they did not shoot the Deputy
    Yes, which is why your white one should be a mirrored pair

  18. #2038
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    Ha's Bro 2UUW
    Legendary Creature - Samurai Bureaucrat
    Partner

    Wizards lose all abilities and can't attack.

    Lieutenant - All spells cost an additional 2

    Grandeur - Create a token copy of target nonland permanent, except replace all instances of "charge counter" or "+1/+1 counter" with energy. It gains Horsemanship.

    T: If a player would have fun, instead create a Gold token.
    1/3

  19. #2039

    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    I wonder how much of a mess something like:

    Obsidian Mirror

    If a card would be exiled, exile it instead.

  20. #2040
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    Re: Obligatory shitty card creation thread

    What would this do?
    Has there ever been an example of a replacement effect doing a replace-in-kind thing?
    Quote Originally Posted by GreatWhale View Post
    Gross, other formats. I puked in my mouth a little.

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