Obligatory shitty card creation thread

[Cthuloo]

One card I'm surprised they haven't made is very simple: or cantrip Edict.

Something I would really like is a cantrip innocent blood.



Each player sacrifices a creature. Draw a card at the beginning of your next turn upkeep.

I think this will be good but not too overpovered, since you must have a very low creature count to have CA, makes it not easily splashable, and the drawing is delayed.

[Willoe]

How about:

XR

Instant

Choose one — ~ deals three times X damage to target creature ; or ~ two times X damage to target player and three times X damage to you.

I think it is a balanced card. For 2R, you can toast a Goyf or a Tombstalker in most situations. For 4R, you can toast a Dreadnought if you choose the first mode.

But I don't know actually, is it too unfair to have a burn spell that deals 6 dmg to a dude for only 2R? (It also dodges Counterbalance, mind you)

When choosing the dmg2dome mode, you will have to have >50% more life than the opponent for it to work properly. I think that is fair.

MattH: Yeah, I'm rather surprised too. If the card had to be balanced, how much would a black instant that read "destroy target creature. Draw a card" cost? 4B?

[quicksilver]

But I don't know actually, is it too unfair to have a burn spell that deals 6 dmg to a dude for only 2R? (It also dodges Counterbalance, mind you)

Well they recently printed a card for 2R that does 5 damage to a creature and you have to sac a land and I think it's a sorcery too.

[Digital Devil]

Bloody Titan ----
Creature - Elemental
If there are no creatures other than Bloody Titan onto the battlefield, Bloody Titan becomes a 5/1 Elemental Berserker creature with Haste.
"It just happened again. I know exactly what to do with him, so I don't need you anymore. You can go aw..." --- Gustha Ebbasdotter, last words
2/4

[santeria]

I saw this posted somewhere else awhile ago. it didnt have split second though.


Finalize -
Instant
Split Second
Target Spell Resolves.

[Hanni]

Jotun Champion
2W
Creature - Giant Soldier
First Strike
Cumulative upkeep—Put two cards in a single graveyard on the bottom of their owner’s library. (At the beginning of your upkeep, put an age counter on this permanent, then sacrifice it unless you pay its upkeep cost for each age counter on it.)
5/1

[DragoFireheart]

Arcanogoyf
1U
Lhurgoyf
Rare
*/1+*

Arcanogoyf's power is equal to the number of card types among cards in all graveyards and its toughness is equal to that number plus 1. (The card types are artifact, creature, enchantment, instant, land, planeswalker, sorcery, and tribal.)

[Nidd]

Arcanogoyf
1U
Lhurgoyf
Rare
*/1+*

Arcanogoyf's power is equal to the number of card types among cards in all graveyards and its toughness is equal to that number plus 1. (The card types are artifact, creature, enchantment, instant, land, planeswalker, sorcery, and tribal.)

No, no, just no. A Goyf that's pitchable to FoW? Hell, no!

[MMogg]

No, no, just no. A Goyf that's pitchable to FoW? Hell, no!

Ooo, you're right, it should be:

Arcanogoyf
1U
Lhurgoyf
Rare
*/1+*

Arcanogoyf's power is equal to the number of card types among cards in all graveyards and its toughness is equal to that number plus 1. (The card types are artifact, creature, enchantment, instant, land, planeswalker, sorcery, and tribal. If Arcanogoyf is put into a graveyard or exiled, put it onto the battlefield instead.

[BreathWeapon]

Another idea,

Exalted Sliver WG

Creature - Sliver

All of your Slivers have Exalted

2/2

Basically, Slivers needs a threat vs Tarmogoyf, so the combination of Muscle and Sinew Slivers pumping effects combined with Exalted would be enough to get there reliably.

It might make a really cool 1/1 for G Elf as well, but Elves are gay.

[Hanni]

Another idea,

Exalted Sliver WG

Creature - Sliver

All of your Slivers have Exalted

2/2

Basically, Slivers needs a threat vs Tarmogoyf, so the combination of Muscle and Sinew Slivers pumping effects combined with Exalted would be enough to get there reliably.

It might make a really cool 1/1 for G Elf as well, but Elves are gay.

Seems extremely underpowered. +1/+1 > Exalted, and you can get that ability on both a 1W and 1G guy. While having a 2/2 body means its swinging in for 3 next turn, it still seems worse than simply having a 1/1 body with +1/+1 to all Slivers. Maybe if you made it 1/1 and have it cost either W or G, that would seem much more fair, especially considering that Slivers typically wants to overcommit and then swing with multiple Flying guys and not just 1 guy at a time.

[Guevera59]

It seems perfectly powered. If you have him and a Sinew Sliver. He swings for 5 power, enough to trump a Goyf.

[Hanni]

It seems perfectly powered. If you have him and a Sinew Sliver. He swings for 5 power, enough to trump a Goyf.

Sinew makes him 3/3, Exalted swinging solo makes him 4/4. 4/4 doesn't trump a Goyf unless it's a 3/4 Goyf. It's perfectly printable, but I'm not sure if Slivers would want to include it over Winged Sliver, which simply allows guys to swing in the air over Goyf. Exalted does nothing special on defense.

[Madmaniac21]

Sinew makes him 3/3, Exalted swinging solo makes him 4/4. 4/4 doesn't trump a Goyf unless it's a 3/4 Goyf. It's perfectly printable, but I'm not sure if Slivers would want to include it over Winged Sliver, which simply allows guys to swing in the air over Goyf. Exalted does nothing special on defense.

Uh, exalted stacks. 2 slivers in play = +2/+2 when swinging solo, so 5/5.

[Hanni]

No shit, wasn't even thinking about that. Good call.

[MMogg]

Speaking of slivers, how about making the search function more playable than the slivercycling Homing Sliver.



(for SilverGreen --> Survival Sliver, All Slivers have “Sacrifice this creature: search your library for a Sliver card, reveal it, and put it into your hand.” 1/1)

The art was shamelessly Googled and doesn't represent the cards functionality, but fucking cool nonetheless.

[Hanni]

I'd like to see some better Rebels. The kind that make Rebels viable.

[MMogg]

I'd like to see some better Rebels. The kind that make Rebels viable.

Oh, you mean like:

Rebellious Goyf

Lhurgoyf
Rare
*/1+*

Rebellious Goyf's power is equal to the number of card types among cards in all graveyards and its toughness is equal to that number plus 1. (The card types are artifact, creature, enchantment, instant, land, planeswalker, sorcery, and tribal.)
I'm tired of being big green dumb beats. I want a purpose in life!


Seriously though, I like Rebels and I'd love to see something narrow and ridiculous that they'd never print.

Underground Funds

Instant
Add to your mana pool. Use this mana only to cast Rebel spells.

I find Rebels are just too damn slow, and need something to give them a boost. Maybe a "Rebel Headquarters" land that provides more mana but only can be spent on Rebels.

[Alecthar]

I think new Goyf's need to be changelings. Without all creature types, how will I use my Merfolk Sovereign's to make my UGoyf unblockable? How will I be able to search for my WGoyf with Linn Sivvi? And perhaps most important, how will I be able to play my RGoyf with my Goblin Lackey?

[Glorfindel]

Underground Funds

Instant
Add to your mana pool. Spend this mana only to cast Rebel spells or to activate abilities of Rebel permanents.

Fixed ...