Disclaimer: I don’t T8 often, so when I do, I’ve gotta make a stupidly long post about it.
Ze Beginnings
Moustaches have always played a great role in American history. Adorning the faces of historical figures the world over, the moustache has been a symbol of power, prestige and panache.
On this weekend of enchanted cardboard and evening debauchery, one moustache set out to make a name for itself the world over…
This
…is not that moustache.
Long story short, sometime this summer, Bryant Cook’s favorite Phillies’ fan, Tivon (Nick) and I decided to visit perennial Sexiest Legacy Player Alive contender Rsaunder (Chris) at Geneseo, play the RIT Mox event, and spend whatever time not set aside for Magical Cards making horrible decisions at SUNY parties.
Before we made the trek west, Chris informed us that Saturday evening’s festivities had a Spanish theme and we were going as euro-trash. By Friday, Team Level 4 Wizards had turned into team Level 4 Moustache (mine was more of a level 3) and we all looked like the type of people who have to notify the neighborhood when they change addresses.
As for what to play, I was torn between Zoo and Team America. Alix Hatfield’s Zoo list was awesome for me at side events in Columbus, but I figured the meta would be a lot of combo and New Horizons and I wasn’t thrilled about the prospects of playing against either on a consistent basis. I also really like Snuff Out, Stifle, Wasteland and Hymn to Tourach. The decision wasn’t that hard.
Here’s what I played:
4 Polluted Delta
4 Verdant Catacombs
1 Misty Rainforest
3 Underground Sea
2 Tropical Island
1 Bayou
1 Swamp
4 Wasteland
4 Tarmogoyf
3 Tombstalker
2 Vendilion Clique
4 Brainstorm
4 Ponder
2 Preordain
4 Force of Will
4 Daze
4 Stifle
3 Hymn to Tourach
3 Snuff Out
3 Engineered Explosives
4 Spell Pierce
3 Tormod’s Crypt
2 Krosan Grip
1 Trygon Predator
3 Ghastly Demise
2 Smother
I really like the list going forward although the ninth fetch was only there because the playgroup didn’t have enough Seas to go around. Clique/Preordain definitely pulled their weight for the whole day.
On Friday, Nick showed up at my house with the pedo-stache in full effect. The drive down was relatively uneventful besides a missed exit and our inability to find a sharpie for a “Free Moustache Rides” sign.
Chris’s apartment however, was awesome. A ton of people showed up, many of them hot and female and even Warden (also (almost black) Chris) from Salvation made an appearance and decided to stay for the weekend. I ended up making out with an asian girl, walking across campus and stumbling in at two in the morning, only to find out how fucking cold September nights get in Geneseo when you have to sleep on the floor without a blanket. Nothing prepares you for the morning like the early stages of hypothermia.
I woke up to a splitting headache coupled with severe dehydration, pounded a breakfast sandwich at the local diner and head off to RIT with the gang. Before I move on any further, fuck whoever laid out that campus. It took us damn near forever to find the site, even with asking both bystanders and campus safety for directions.
Anyway, Chris and Nick decide to play TES while Warden goes with Landstill. I borrow nine tenths of Team America from the guys, sleeve up and get registered.
Round One: Mono-Black/The Gate
I lose the roll and keep a hand with two Stifles, three lands, a Snuff Out and a Tombstalker. He Thoughtseizes me, takes the big guy and says go. I play a land and pass back. At the beginning of his upkeep, the TO announces that the round will be re-started due to a severe amount of mispairings. I am amongst them.
This is fantastic for me because The Gate runs a train on pretty much any tempo strategy and I have even more dead cards than Stifle/Waste because of Snuff Out. This is the best bad-matchup dodge I’ve ever been a part of.
Round One Point Five: Mono Black
I keep a hand with a Sea, a Waste and some spells. His first turn is a Rit into a Hymn and I immediately think I’m up shit creek. Luckily, neither mana source is taken, and I start digging with cantrips. My Dazes prove to be a huge hurdle for him, as he runs a second Hymn as well as a Hypnotic Specter headlong into them. Unfortunately for me, he drops a Nantuko Shade with a whole lot of Swamps on the board.
All I have is a Snuff Out.
Sadface.
Luckily, I’m a mize. I get tagged once with Shade, but rip the Explosives a turn later and wipe out the little bastard. Tombstalker hits on my side and I’m starting to feel the tide of the match turn. That is, until he drops Shade number two. Again, all I have is Snuff Out. I Ponder into Goyf and two Forces of Will. I play the Tarmogoyf and hope that he doesn’t have any action the next turn. He doesn’t. I swing with the team, trade with the Shade and Force his next three plays en route to getting there.
Game two is less mizy on my part but I’m not gonna complain. I keep a really strong one lander, and get lucky and draw into the second mana source. He extirpates my Dazes. I think Clique does something cool and gets me there.
Round Two: Ichorid
He flashes me a Coliseum, so I know that I better have an answer for whatever his turn one play is, and I hope he can’t just DDD me out of the game. He mulls to six and tries to Carful Study, which I Force. Unfortunately for me, I can’t find a way to end the game. He starts amassing cards and I actually have to cast Hymn to try and stall for time. He gets a lone Ichorid out and I answer with a Clique. His dredges end up being awful (one Narcomeba in twenty or so cards) and I win once I resolve Tarmogoyf.
Game two, my hand is, Fetch, Wasteland, Clique, Force, Force, Tombstalker, Tormod’s Crypt. My opponent mulls to five. I’m awesome.
Round Three: Saito Folk
He doesn’t draw many threats and I quickly deal with the ones he runs out. Wasteland works over a Mutavault, I think I countered another guy, and he gets stuck with a lot of blue cards and a Silvergill Adept in his hand. I resolve a Clique and get there.
Game two features a mull to six for me and my opponent starting with multiple Cursecatchers coupled with multiple Lords of Atlantis. Luckily, I have a steady stream of removal to keep his team at bay. Ghastly Demise spends a lot of time being awesome, and I get really close to stabilizing with a Tarmogoyf, but a well timed Submerge is just too much for me to handle.
Game three features me blowing up a land or three and him getting manascrewed. Unfortunately, I’m about as good at drawing creatures as he is at drawing land. We play draw go for far too long, until I’m finally able to put pressure down with a Tombstalker. He doesn’t have the Submerge and I still have a hand full of removal. Needless to say, I get there.
Round Four: Tendrils Combo
We cantrip back and fourth, he plays a lot of basics which make my Wastelands and Stifles sad, but my Tombstalker apparently makes him sadder. I don’t draw a ton of gas, but he doesn’t have any action either and my big black friend swings in to take the game.
I actually don’t know what he’s playing at this point, but I figure I should board Spell Pierce anyway, because it’s likely storm.
Game two features me being a dumbass. He gets an early Confidant and is poised to bury me with card advantage. I have a couple of Cliques in my hand, but don’t get the mana to cast them for a few turns. He casts a small Tendrils of Agony and drops me to three. I draw the mana for Clique, but unfortunately I suck at life and don’t cast it in response to Lion’s Eye Diamond. He Infernals for the win.
Game three I keep sort of an iffy hand with a Force, Daze and Brainstorm but no clock. I know that if he has a hand with a lot of protection that I’m sunk, and much to my chagrin, my Daze gets sacrificed to an early Duress. I draw a second Daze and spend the Force on his Bob. Luckily for me, Tombstalker shows up and I’m finally able to put some pressure down. He Duresses, which I decide to Daze, because it would tap him out if he decided to pay. He does, and takes my EE. I’m now completely at his mercy. He has five cards in his hand and knows that I have no action. That is, until I rip Hymn off the top, take his Infernal and Cabal Ritual and put the brakes on his combo. He plays a Confidant and passes. I mize Force, but don’t have a means to cast it. He draws both his cards, cracks back with Bob and passes back. I draw Spell Pierce, swing with Tombstalker and Force his Infernal for the win.
ID Into Top Eight
Chris went 4-2
Nick went 3-3
Warden went 2-3
Top Eight: New Horizons (Jimrynk)
His turn one Ponder is met with a turn one Wasteland from me. My Clique meets a Force of Will, but my Goyf, as well as Clique number two hit the board and start applying pressure. He has a threat-dense draw as well, but I have two Snuff Outs, which keep my dudes swinging. He drops a Terravore, which puts the breaks on Goyf, but Clique gets in there and drops him to within an alpha strike of losing. Jim then plays a Knight and swings with the Vore to drop me to five. I draw Ponder, hit the third Snuff Out, go to one and win the game.
In game two, I keep a hand with a couple Ghastly Demises and some cantrips. I draw the Waste, and try to draw out a Stifle by going for that turn one. Unfortunately for me, not only does he have the Stifle for the Wasteland, but he has the Stifle for my fetch as well. He then drops Knight turn three and unfortunately for me, that fucker is out of Demise range. Another threat hits the board after, and we shuffle up and go to game three.
This is right about the time when everything I did the night before finally comes back to shut my brain off. I play a couple early Goyfs, swing one of them into a Knight because I apparently can’t count, fetch before Pondering, and then don’t shuffle my Ponder because I also apparently can’t read. I draw three straight dead cards, and still would have gotten there if he didn’t have the Submerge for my Tombstalker. Oops.
I take my store credit and go back to Geneseo to prepare for the party.
Unfortunately, there’s a pretty big difference between Spain and Mexico, and apparently not everyone got that memo. When we got there, literally nobody had the euro-trash idea, and there were a bunch of dudes in sombreros who didn’t exactly look approving of the sudden influx of moustache at the party. So we said fuck it and brought the party to the porch. Warden ended up hooking up with this one girl, and Nick was putting in work with another group. Then Chris fell down the stares and the aforementioned sombrero-wearers took offense to one of Chris’ roommates. Long story short, we got kicked out (Warden bounced with his girl) before midnight and with a drive ahead of me, I decided to pass out on the couch when we got home. Of course, the rest of the house didn’t feel like letting me go quietly into the night, and I finally fell back asleep after having a can fight.
Next morning, we all said good bye to Warden after his walk of pride back to the house and after watching Role Models and the Bills game, Nick and I bid Chris and the rest of the house farewell and drove the four hours back to Saratoga.
It was a damn good weekend.
Props:
Chris for giving us a place to crash, party and loaning me 90% of the deck. And for falling down everywhere.
Nick for being an awesome co-pilot, having a ridiculous moustache and creeping as hard as possible all the time.
Warden for getting some. And scaring the shit out of Chris’ roommate.
Dan Signorini for making Team America
Team America for being absurd and drawing me the win anytime I needed it.
Snuff Out, for being free.
Vendilion Clique for improving my threat density
Geneseo for knowing how to get down.
Slops:
Whoever organized Saturday’s festivities for doing a great job at explaining whether it was a Mexican Fiesta or a Barcelona party.
Me, for playing like absolute shit against Jim. It would have been nice to get there for a change and I definitely was capable of it.
Nick, for posting that picture he’s going to post when this goes up.
The sombrero brigade. For not having the balls to look like windowless van drivers.
After all this, there’s really just one more thing left to say.
Team Rehab- We Keep Coming Back For More
Team Blitzkrieg- Swagga.
Storm Boards
Originally Posted by FakeSpam
Congrats on your finish big guy.
I'd like to start off by saying, I heard there was a metric fuckton of TES. None of which in top 8? I'm disappointed guys.
Secondly, I'll never root for a phillies fan even if he is playing my deck.
Nice work, there is nothing quite like a luxurious Mustache. And you didn't rape the list too badly.
Also, Vendilion Clique.
...
You know the story.
P.S. No more losing to New Horizons.
they haunt minds...
I hated Predict when I played it with more support in June. With only 9 cantrips at the absolute most to support it, I just wasn't a fan. Preordain on the other hand, was absolutely awesome.
I know the collective state of Virginia hates Clique, but he was really good all day. The only time I wanted Tombstalker over him was when I was racing the Ichorid against Dredge, and the Goyf I drew fixed that situation just fine.
Nine threats is absolutely the way to go in any tempo deck though. Especially when you don't have shroud guys.
And I won't lose to New Horizons anymore because I don't think I'll be playing with that much of a hangover anytime soon.
Team Rehab- We Keep Coming Back For More
Team Blitzkrieg- Swagga.
Storm Boards
The better part was when he woke up and we convinced him he had been masturbating in front of 3 or 4 people while he was blacked out.
Last edited by Tivon; 09-16-2010 at 05:27 PM.
Will says I'm in BZK. I don't know what is going on.
Ok, seriously, photobucket that shit.
The better part was when he woke up and we convinced him he had been masturbating in front of 3 or 4 people while he was blacked out.
I demand pics of the girls you folks hooked up with.
This looks like a job for me.
Most of my posts will be written from my phone, so please excuse the eventual lack of proper typing.
I'm here to kick ass and play card games.
BZK
@rsaunder:
I'd tap that. Tap like I had a Twiddle+Gelectrode combo active. (I do love my Izzet deck in casual. :P)
I lost to rsaunder's TES build in round 6.
He said he was hungover, I was sleep-deprived, I suppose that kind of balances.
super fun read man, thanks for the report. A pic style docu of the night would have been great if the scenes were as funny irl as they are in words.
Nice report.
I am curious about the "vendilion clique story"
I wish, WISH we could oblige. Big sloppy f*ck*** slops to there being no photos.
I'm here to kick ass and play card games.
BZK
Congrats on the finish. However...
What's the deal with the spanish + moustache combination? Actually I'm from near Barcelona and I recently grew a moustache ("Magnum P.I." style), but it's just for the kicks of seeing my workmates' weird glances at my face. You see, almost nobody sports moustache nowadays in Spain nor Portugal (another country also once-renowed for facial hairiness), so spotting a guy with it induces weird reactions on observer's faces...
When you say Preordain really pulled its weight, can you explain what you mean by that? What made you decide to go with a 10 cantrip base? The way I see it, Preordain is just a poor man's Ponder, and too many sorceries make it difficult to keep Stifle mana open. I feel like the 2 spots could be used on something better like Spell Pierce or Inquisition of Kozilek. LMK what you think.
Good report!
Primarily due to how the Iberian Peninsula used to be known for the epic 'staches that came out that area. And stereotyping. Cause I love me some of that. We also looked creepy as hell and I personally made the most of that
and yeah, we definately should have had more picures - at the very least three, one for every time rsaunder bit it hard
Will says I'm in BZK. I don't know what is going on.
Haha, I guess we aren't up to date with Spanish facial hair stylings. We basically just wanted to get as creepy as possible Needless to say, that mission was thoroughly accomplished.
@ keys: I went with 10 cantrips because that's how many Dan ran in Columbus and that seemed to work out alright for him. I didn't like Predict when I played it with more support and I felt like another draw spell was the right use of that slot. Preordain works because it's early game action when you want it to be, and digging for cards in the lategame is never bad. Cards like Inquisition and Spell Pierce also interfere with your ability to play Stifle and are markedly worse in the lategame. Additionally, only running two of them drastically decreases your ability to see them in good situations.
Team Rehab- We Keep Coming Back For More
Team Blitzkrieg- Swagga.
Storm Boards
Be a man. Predict is unreal.
P.S. If you insist on running Clique, it's also kind of nice having more stuff to do on their turn. Leaving the option of stifle, predict, or playing a threat EOT is kinda neat.
they haunt minds...
Right now I'm playing the same list as yours except -2 Preordain, -1 EE, +3 Inquisition
And in the SB, -1 Spell Pierce, -1 Trygon, -1 Smother, -3 Crypt, +2 Pithing Needle, +1 EE, +3 Extirpate
Inquisition isn't that bad late game, since it can still hit removal when Daze and Spell Pierce wouldn't, clearing the way so Stalker can get there. It's also a good proactive T1 play if you don't need/want to keep Stifle mana open. Works great with Needle too, though that's a minor plus.
My sideboard isn't much different from yours except for Needle and Extirpate. Both cards are extremely good right now. Needle on Survival, Vial, or Jace is huge. Extirpate is better than Crypt against everything except Dredge, and especially Loam and Vengevine which are much more popular.
my $0.02
Last edited by keys; 09-16-2010 at 09:39 PM.
Meh. It's an awful topdeck for sure and the fact that it needs a set up spell just makes me hate it that much more. It also doesn't help that I was in topdeck mode almost every time I drew Preordain and it filtered me into ridiculous draws consistently. That and I legitimately don't know how to properly play Predict. It was an absolute trainwreck for me at Eli's.
It's not so much that I'm insistent on Clique, it's that I want to run nine threats and running two of them in that meta just felt better than a 4/4/1 split. They just happened to be randomly good throughout the day, pitching to Force, not being 2x Tombstalker, etc. If you think up a better creature for that slot, I'm all ears.
And how is Inquisition good against removal? After the first few turns, it's pretty much consistently dead. And cutting removal while simultaneously lessening your ability to draw said removal just seems awful to me.
Additionally, my board wasn't optimal. Trygon was because I wanted something that could kinda-sorta pass as threat number ten against decks with a ton of removal because Chris lent out his Jaces. It never got boarded in.
I did really like the 5 extra removal spells in the board. That was hot.
Also, there is now a picture of me passed the fuck out on the Source. Fantastic.
Team Rehab- We Keep Coming Back For More
Team Blitzkrieg- Swagga.
Storm Boards
I just meant that if your opponent has 3 or more lands untapped, Inquisition can still get rid of your opponent's Path to Exile, while Daze or Spell Pierce won't. Keeping your threats alive is important when you only play 9 of them. Still, my point isn't that Inquisition is a good topdeck, just that it isn't a terrible one. I'm still testing more of the 10 cantrip setup to compare.
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